The robin's beating heart
by fejuima Kuzo
Summary: Dick Grayson left Bruce. There's always been speculation of why the kid left his adoptive father. No one really seemed to notice when the laughing companion 'robin' suddenly disappeared. After the titans were formed, it seemed young robin vanished again. (FINISHED! Prequel to Oh, Robin!)
1. prolog

True, there is every reason to panic in the face of danger. I suppose I should be scared or at least sad… but I'm not sure I can be, I can't feel anything. Maybe it's the loss of blood, but what I see now… it makes me so happy, like he's really… right here, heh… man, is it cold in here?


	2. The Robin's red breast

**The robin's red breast**

It was a slow month, nothing out of the ordinary was happening in jump city. That, in itself, was out of the ordinary. Robin sat at his desk, reading old news paper clippings of his most hated enemy. 'Heh, enemy… that's a thought. I wonder what Bruce would say…' his eyes narrowed in thought, and he mindlessly creased just under his spandex-clad left breast 'oh… haven't thought about him in a while. How WOULD he handle the whole 'Slade' thing? Would he try to fight with me? Would he finally trust me enough to fight? Trust me enough to know my own strength?' he snorted and stood up, dropping his hand and walked out "Titans, it's time for noon training, who's in?" all the titans were doing normal titan things. Raven was staring out the windows, BB and Cy were playing the latest video game, and Starfire was playing with Silkey. Obviously, he would be training alone. He walked into his training stimulation room, and spoke loud enough for the room to hear "Attack simulation five" an immediate response of moving targets came from his right side, and he let his thoughts start running as he went through the motions.

"_Master Bruce is out today, young master Grayson. He said to train." Alfred smiled softly, almost sadly. A younger Richard looked down and clutched his uniform to his chest "is he with that woman again?" Alfred nodded "I believe so… Come, allow me to get you some cookies, and a cup of cocoa, you look absolutely chilled to the bone." Richard only nodded and fallowed. The man was doing his best to make him happy; he could at least play along. "Alfred?" the kind old man smiled "yes, young master Grayson?" He sighed and closed his eyes "tomorrow is my last Monday until winter vacation, right?" Alfred nodded, still smiling "three weeks to celebrate the holidays, young master Grayson." Richard smiled "In three days, please have a regular suit for him? My school is hosting a play, for all winter holidays. I'm going to star as Joseph! Bruce promised to come." Alfred grinned, "Absolutely! I'll ever iron a red and green scarf for him, how's that?" Richard nodded, delighted._

Robin snarled and hit the head off of a target "Attack Simulation nineteen!" he snarled, more targets fell around him, darts rained down around him, he dodged every last one, glaring. "Is friend robin well?" Starfire asked raven, who was staring at the door "yeah, Star, I'm sure he's just training a bit harder today, you know, he does kinda get restless when the city's peaceful." Starfire nodded

_Richard looked out at the audience, not being able to make out anyone's faces, just shadows. As the light beat in his eyes he spoke his lines, did everything perfectly. Bruce was out there, watching him, he had to make him proud! The lights came on, the over head ones shutting off, he and the rest of the cast bowed, he was grinning as he looked out into the crowd again… and his grin fell. Alfred stood there, clapping enthusiastically "Bravo!" his kind old voice cried, full of joy and pride. Richard closed his eyes tightly against the tears._

Robin growled, snapping his eyes open "ATTACK SIMULATION TWENTY EIGHT!" he continued to fight, flinging himself into the air, sweat started running down his back and across his mask. All through this, his memories sparked. Oh, he remembered. Bruce never showed. And Batman wasn't busy that night. No. he was keeping his name as Bruce Wayne, playboy millionaire. He had completely forgotten everything. There was no time for a kid in his life. So, he couldn't be a kid. That was it. He could never have impressed Bruce; Bruce never paid much attention to Richard. But Batman always praised Robin for his work! He snorted. That one thought had cost him everything. That was the day Richard Grayson died. Right in his Bruce's arms, he died, cold, and alone.

_He changed into his costume in the limo, Alfred looking sadly at him "young master Richard, it is late in the middle of winter. Would you not consider waiting for perhaps master Bruce?" Richard shook his head vehemently "no, no. I'm sure I can patrol alone tonight. Batman's busy tonight! Besides, I can handle a bit of work!" he hopped out of the moving limo, landing gracefully in the shadows and ran through the night. He hadn't heard the news, hadn't seen the bat signal in the sky. It was too late "ROBIN!" batman caught up with him, running at his side "what are you doing here?!" Robin smiled "patrolling." Batman shook his head "The Joker escaped. You shouldn't be out here alone!" robin glared "I shouldn't have been alone tonight at all!" batman snorted "what's that supposed to m-"he closed his eyes "…the play." "Yeah!" robin nodded, glaring slightly "but since SOMEONE was too busy, someone else had to do the work "Robin, don't say that! I am doing my best!" Robin's anger flared "YOUR BEST?!" he screamed, stopping in mid-stride "how about you just try?! You paid for my school; you don't care about my grades! I got all A's this year! You pay my health bill, but you never ask how I'm feeling, or what the doctor said. Well, I'm doing great, thanks for asking!" batman stopped as well "...Oh, robin, I'm sorry. Truly, I am. But what do you want? Do you want me to blow our cover? Do you want me to drop everything just to ask how your feeling?" robin glared "if you didn't want me, then why did you adopt me? Why didn't you let me die too?!" batman looked as though he'd been slapped, and was about to speak before a sadistic laugh filled the air "The Bird and the Bat, got in a spat, all on a winter's night!" they both looked up and glared "JOKER!" the man laughed again "You want me, Batsy? Come and get me!" he ran off. Both fallowed in hot pursuit. Batman got tired of chasing fast and threw a batring in front of the joker, who grinned like a fool "Missed me, Batsy!" batman smirked "I don't think so." The joker gasped and turned around. The batrang had cut straight through a light pole, making it fall, directly toward the Joker. He twisted out of the way and continued running, of course, the duo foolishly fallowed. Half a mile later, he pulled out a gun. Now, the joker was deranged, and sadistic, A complete nut case! But he would never kill Batman; he'd pulled so many guns on him before, one that shot bubbles, one that said 'bang' and one that even had a flag pop out that said 'pow'. So, naturally, neither expected the bullet to come out, or the crack, so much louder then thunder, to sound. Batman got out of the way just in time, Robin never saw it coming, and fell back with a cry. "Robin!"_

Robin walked out of the exercise room, soaked with sweat, his hand gently place over his chest, just under his right breast "CY! BB! RAVEN! STAR!" they all turned to look at him "Training in three hours, no excuses. We are NOT getting lazy just because the villains are." "a..alright robin… you ok?" robin blinked and, realizing what he meant, dropped his hand "yeah, just an old injury acting up. Let's do at least one good work out today. Three hours, alright?" they nodded simultaneously. Robin trudged up and took a shower.


	3. Every bird must leave the nest

**Every bird must leave the nest**

The training went well, oddly enough. No one seemed to complain. They were all relaxing now, eating pizza as a reward for all their hard work "yum! It's good today." Robin said as he ate happily. There were murmurs of agreement. As if it was just to ruin their great moods, the mini alarms on their communicators screamed. "Titans! GO!" they ran off all in the same direction.

Slade laughed, watching the little red dots on his screen "like moths to the flame, come, my little bird, return to your cage!" he laughed louder.

Slade bots came from every direction "it's a trap! Spread out!" they got their weapons ready, but the black and orange robots stopped right where they were "uh… robin? I got a bad feeling about this." Cyborg mumbled as smoke billowed out of the robots chest cavities. "It's sleeping gas! Hold your breaths!" robin covered his own mouth.

The thick clouds surrounded them, choking the air out of the entire area. Starfire tried to fly out, but a smoke-covered bot snuck up on her, unseen and hit her back to the ground. One by one, they fell, coughing and gagging "well, well, well." Slade taunted, coming up to them as the air cleared "Sleep well, robin." He picked him up and disappeared with him, in the middle of the winter day, and no one would see it. When the rest of the titans came too, it was night "ro..." raven coughed "robin?" she croaked looking around. "Oh god… no!" she jumped to her feet. "I said bacon!" Cy said, sitting up "wait… what happened?" he shook his sleep fogged head back and forth "It was Slade. He's got Robin!" they all headed to the tower to regroup and find a battle plan.

"Hello, robin" Slade purred as the hero lifted himself to his elbows and kneed "Where am I?" Slade grabbed his chin "Your home, my boy." He lifted him to his feet, almost affectionately "I've been keeping a special eye on you." He muttered softly, an amused tone tinted his voice when robin jerked away and took on a fighting stance before falling back down, face first on the cold, hard ground. "I gave you a sedative while you slept. You are basically drunk right now, you can't fight me, so let's talk." He laid him on a mattress "you really have been pissing me off, robin." He scolded mockingly "How?" robin retorted, pulling further away from him "let us start with last week. That Red X… he seems… interested, doesn't he?" Robin snorted "so? A gay villain took a fancy to a hero, big deal!" Slade's eye flared in anger, yet his voice was calm "robin, you are mine, do you understand that? You are my enemy, my apprentice, MY work of art! I even own your THOUGHTS!" robin blinked, and then looked away "The only time I think about you, it's with hate, Slade. I don't belong to anyone. Even if I did, I'd sooner be Red's then yours!" Slade snarled and stood so fast and violently that the chair he'd been sitting on slammed to the ground "is that why you let him go?" he grabbed his chin "are you as you seem, then? A mere teenager, determined, but still run on hormones. Pathetic for a hero!" robin glared "I'm NOT interested. Not in Red X, Not in you. Not in ANYONE!" Slade rolled his eye and sat on the bed, calming down and ran a surprisingly gentle hand down his cheek, training it to the back of his head, lifting him slightly. "Oh? What about Batman?" Robin choked on air. And looked away

"_Please, Richard, wake up, please!" Bruce's voice pleaded. Richard's eyes slowly opened "Bruce?" he groaned "Ouch." He suddenly gasped and sat up "THE JOKER!" he winced and clutched the left side of his bandaged chest "No, lay back down." Bruce gently coaxed him back onto the bed "Thank god you're alright. The Joker's been apprehended, and taken back to prison." He said, soothingly "I… was shot?" robin blinked "yes, and had the bullet been just a little more to the right… it would have hit your heart… if it had been a perfect shot… you would be dead." Robin looked up "Oh." Bruce glared "is that all your life is to you, Richard? An 'oh'?" Richard laughed softly "yeah, I guess so." He smiled softly at a very upset Bruce "look… You asked me something, Richard, right before we heard the joker, do you remember what that was?" Richard blinked and though "I asked… why you didn't let me die…" Bruce nodded "I asked myself the same thing, while a friend of mine took the bullet out of your chest, 'why does this boy mean so much to me? Why do I take care of him, instead of letting someone else do it?' and I think I found out why." Richard blinked "oh?" Bruce nodded "Alfred told me, that, since you've been here, you celebrate your time with me, every second I focus on you, you adore, like it's special… like its treasured time." Richard blushed "he... he said that?" Bruce nodded "that made me think. Normal children, especially if they had seen what you, unfortunately, had seen, they would be traumatized, and would have sought more attention with me, had I taken them in. Every time it stormed, you never once came to ask to sleep in my room, like a normal kid. You never complained about what foods you disliked, or watched T.V all the time. I made you do this, I created 'Robin'" Richard blinked "I don't get it..?" "Damn, Richard… do you… do you feel… there's no other way to put this.., Richard, do you think you love me?" Richard flushed red "No, I don't think I love you!" Bruce sighed "goo-" Richard interrupted him "I KNOW I love you," Bruce closed his eyes "i.. see… Robin cant exist anymore." Richard blinked "what?!" "I said, you have to stop fighting crime. You'r working to hard… I almost lost you once tonight, I cant let your attention-seeking distract you again."_

_That night, robin left Wayne manor. He ran away, never to return. _


	4. the feather falls, so slowly

"That… was a long time ago. Ok?" robin growled "and we were never 'in love', and most importantly, it's not your god damned business!" Slade laughed, and shook his head "oh? I think it is, Robin. You belong to me now. You always have." He grabbed his chin roughly "hear this, before you deny it. After you left Batman, who occupied your mind?Who took away that pain, that fear in your heart?"Robin snarled "I wasn't hurt, or scared!"

_Robin arrived in jump city, hand over his chest, wincing slightly. God, what had he done? He should go back; he should tell Bruce he was sorry… NO! He would NOT beg. He had NOTHING to be sorry for! The man had missed HIS play, he had told HIM not to fight anymore. And worst of all, he had turned away when Robin had tried to kiss him… Never mind! He had to find a place to live. He had saved up his allowances for years, he was sure he had at least 7 hundred. He looked in his bag and gritted his teeth. The NERVE Bruce had! He has stuffed some cash in Robin's case! He didn't think he could make it on his own! Well, he wouldn't go and return it; no… he DID need it. God, hero or not, it was still disturbing. Not a day in his life had he spent on the streets. And now, he knew there was no other choice. He sat under a bush, hidden from any prying eyes and clutched his bag, and cried, He cried his heart out. After the last tear fell, he vowed to never again cry. Not for anything. Not for anyone._

"Is that so?" Slade tilted his head "you miss him. Even now I know you do. But, in time, you will forget him. I will be all you think about…" he smirked and clicked off his mask, turning out the lights. Yes, his face was naked now, but still unable to be seen "robin? Are you cold? I can feel you shaking." The boy in question snorted "just resisting the urge to kill you." Slade laughed for the third time that night "you can't even move my boy. Besides, killing can be fun; I do it all the time." Robin closed his eyes. Being as vulnerable as the drugs had made him, knowing he was with a killer was a lot worse than suspecting it. "I don't want to kill YOU, robin…" Slade put a hand on his cheek, his warm breath playing on his neck as the weight on the bed shifted "I tried to make you mine by force, and threats. This time, you will come to me willingly. Trust me" Robin choked back a hysterical laugh "no, I will never come to you." Slade smirked and placed a chaste kiss against the boy's throat, making robin give a gasp, of disgust or surprise, he didn't know. "G...Get off!" Robin commanded, pushing weakly against him. "I don't think so, my little bird." He nipped the boy's neck, running his tong along the flesh. Robin pushed at him again, closing his eyes, his breath catching in his throat "What are you doing?!" his voice, which was meant to sound harsh and cold, came out soft and warm; almost a moan "Giving you what your body has so badly craved, for so very long." He breathed our and put his hand on Robin's knee, rubbing circles on his lower outer thigh with his thumb. "But, I suppose, it's a mind over matter thing, after all, you wouldn't want it, right?" he sat up and clicked his mask back on. Robin held back the wine of disappointment, and glared up at him "it's not mind over matter. I just hate your guts." Slade smirked under his mask, 'phase one, complete' he thought and walked to the door "Try not to lie, it's bad for you." He walked out.

"**What do we do? Robin might be strong and all, but its **_**Slade **_**were talking about here. He's stronger, faster, and, well; let's face it, smarter than him." BB said, his ears going back "Yes, but friend Robin will come back, right?" CY put a hand on her shoulder "Look, Starfire, He's come back before… With our help, we don't even know where he is. God, I hope he's alright." Raven glared "of course Robin's ok. Just give it two, three days tops. He is strong, and he's trained nonstop. He can do just as well without us as he would with us. He is our leader for a reason!" everyone looked at her, shocked at her declaration "robin is… the strongest among us?" Starfire blinked, Raven just nodded and looked out the window.**

The next morning, robin woke up in the room Slade had put him in. thinking of the devil, the orange and black clad man appeared, food on a tray in hand "Good morning Robin." He sat on the bedside and set the tray on the bedside table, the shift of the mattress pulled something at Robin's waist and arms, he looked and, sure enough, he was bound by two silky yet strong ropes around his wrists, and a blanketed metal bar around his waist, wearing only his green tights "Where the hell are my clothes?!" "They're in the wash. And watch your language. I brought you breakfast. I will have to feed you; I don't trust you not to run if I untie you." His eye sparkled in amusement as he reached for an apple "I wouldn't even think about fighting me if I were you. If you do not eat at least half of the meal I've prepared, I shall feed you with a stomach tube and protein shots." Robin blinked "…what, really?" Slade nodded and held the fruit to his face "eat." Unable to deny his hunger, or the threat by Slade, he grudgingly took a bite. His hunger got the better of him and he ate the apple, as Slade turned it for him, forgetting ware he was, he even licked the juices off of the man's gloved hand. Shocked he jerked back and looked away "there, I'm done." Slade smirked "oh no, not quite. I still have an omelet, sliced potatoes and a fruit salad, its strawberries and grapes. What will you have next?" Robin groaned

"**Day one, Robin is a no show. I tried his communicator all night. Guys, I'm totally freaking!" BB whined "We have to find him!" Starfire cried "But we don't know where to even start looking." Cyborg sadly mumbled "I know where we look." Raven announced, gliding into the room, all heads snapped up "you know where he is?" Cyborg asked "no," she shook her head "I'm a witch, not a detective… But we know one" "we do?" BB thought "nope, can't think of a single one." Vyborg looked at Starfire who shrugged helplessly "well, WE don't know him, but he knows all of us, and he knows Robin. I say… We call the Batman." everyone gaped "Ray, it's been like, three years, and robin refuses to even think about that guy! He wouldn't like us to bring him into all a' this." Raven looked down "You know, you said he 'wouldn't' like he was dead," Cy shook his head "I didn't mean-""I know" raven interrupted him "but if we don't act fast, he might soon be. I tapped into his emotions about an hour ago. I felt… terrible" she wrapped her arms around herself "I felt scared, ashamed, alone… I felt anger and hate like I've never know. I have no clue what is going on, but I have no intention of finding out the hard way. What will we do?" she turned to him "let him suffer now, or be ticked off later?" the titans sat together and started their conversation, letting their thoughts and ideas come up, hoping for a different plan.**


	5. the broken bird and the unblinded bat

_**When a robin loses its wings an assassin sings**_

About two weeks of repetition, Robin would be fed from Slade's hand. Then Slade would leave.

All Robin would think about was either how to escape, or his capture. Every night Slade would come into his room and kiss his neck, his hand getting a little higher on his thigh every night. And damn him, he liked it.

Sometimes he would just imagine different people, or pretend he was else ware, and that Slade was doing these things on different circumstances. He shuddered. Something HAD to be wrong with him. He needed to get OUT of there!  
He struggled against the bindings, they were strong. Fear started to come from no ware, he started thrashing, the ropes slicing deep into his wrists. Dear god, he was having a panic attack!

~.~

Slade observed this through his monitor and ran toward the boy's room.

Robin thrashed more, the silk staining crimson with his blood, then, suddenly the rope was loose, and the binding around his stomach lifted. Two warm arms wrapped around him and a hand stroked his hair "Robin, are you INSANE?!"

Robin shook "Let me go, please. I have to go!" Slade rubbed his back and shoulders "Robin, I haven't hurt you, I won't hurt you." He pulled back slightly

Robin gulped "that's why you have to let me go. I don't like it, I can't stay here anymore."

Slade shook his head "You must just be restless, After all, I'm sure your dying to fight me, hmmm?" he turned out the lights and his mask clicked off. Before robin could think about it, he lifted his head, ready to have his neck ravished.

Slade chuckled darkly "I don't think so robin, I want you to come to me." His voice echoed around him "you have to prove your desire for me, if you desire me, in any way. Do you want me to kiss you? Do you want me to fight you? Show me. I cannot read your mind."

His voice led Robins straining eyes to the dark at the end of his bed. He knew where he was, but he didn't know WHAT he wanted Slade to do. He really, didn't want any pain, and, at this point, if he fought Slade, he would lose, and he would be in pain. But he was unsure of his feelings for Slade. Yes, he'd obsessed over this man, and wanted to catch him, but _why_? He could fight; no doubt about it. He had tried to take over the world… kind of. Though, Robin felt somehow, that he would have done so by now, had he really planned to.

Suddenly, he felt himself smiling "what if I just lay here?" he stretched like a cat and smirked at the surrounding shadows. Slade chuckled warmly "Do you want to see my face, Robin?" The boy's eyes widened "…seriously?" Slade laughed again "I asked if you wanted to, I never said I would let you." Robin glared and rubbed at his own raw wrists

"Don't do that, you'll irritate them" Slade barked, suddenly grabbing his hands.

Robin laughed and closed his eyes "I'm sure I'll be fine…" the humor left his voice "Why, Slade?"

He blinked "why what?"

Robin surprised them both by leaning against the older man's chest "Why do you do this to me? Kidnap me, fight me, fallow me… torture me?" the man's chest rumbled in a deep laugh as he pulled him close "I think you know why. At least, I hope you know why. What would you do, if, suddenly, Batman called, begging you to come back?" Robin chewed on his lip, thinking "I wouldn't get the message. You stole my communicator." Slade smirked "Yes, I did." He nuzzled Robin's hair, kissing his head "I won't give you up because I am not a fool, like your old mentor."

Robin snarled and shoved him away "Batman is no fool!"

Slade pulled him back to his chest "to me, he is! You are so beautiful, so lethal; if you wanted to kill someone you could in about ten seconds, maybe a little less. But you won't, never has it crossed your mind to break out the teachings of that man. He said to never kill a fellow human being, did he not?"

Robin blinked "how did you know?"

Slade shrugged "I know of people like him. I know how he thinks. But, you have to ask yourself, is there really always another option? What if I told you that you could be freed, if you were to kill me? You know I could never fallow you again."

Robin shook his head "killing you… it isn't MY Decision to make; if you live or die. I will bring you to justice, and the courts will decide your fate."

Slade pinned him to the mattress "But that's not what you want, is it? If they put me in jail, I could break out. If they kill me, how can you be sure I died? And the worst thought, what if they do nothing? What if, somehow I am special, and I can… let's say… get away with murder?"

Robin's eyes widened "that can't be the case! You are a criminal, and my city's police aren't corrupt!"

Slade smirked "I'm just voicing your own thoughts." He kissed both of the boys bloody wrists, straddling his hips "hmmm, I like the way you taste." He moaned.

Robin blushed, shaking slightly "Slade... What's wrong with your voice?"

Indeed, Slade's voice changed, it was almost completely different from his own; instead of the usual cold indifference it was hot and hungry, almost starved. He laughed and latched onto his wrist and moaned deep in his throat, sucking at the blood, making it flow freely "Oh, yummy." He grabbed Robin's legs and pried them apart.

"Oh god. Please Slade. Please don't!" he tried to close his legs. Slade suddenly stopped, cold and still "I can't, Robin… I'm sorry, please, forgive me." He ran a hand down his face and suddenly became hungry again, and ripped off his tights. "I'll try to be gentle, I doubt I can!"

Tears came to Robins eyes as Slade tore his body in two from the inside out "OWOWOW!" Slade kissed him deeply "I know, I know, I'm sorry."

He pounded into him ruthlessly, closing his own eyes tightly; he released and slumped on top of him, panting. "I'm sorry, my love." He whispered and sat up.

Robin covered himself with the sheets, shaking and covering his mouth, trying to his sobs. Slade took a deep breath and turned the lamp on. At the side of robin's bed say a sad man with white hair, his beautiful, young face wracked with inner torture, and a single eye, staring directly at him, the other eye was covered with a cloth tied about his head.

"You needn't know everything robin. But you do need to know why I did what I did." He took a breath and stared at him "there was a horrible was going on, I was a soldier, young and eager to fight. I had been trained to kill, and take no prisoners. There was a beautiful woman, she was a soldier to the enemy, and more heartless then I, ever could be. I took her to face our fair courts, along the way she told me that her name was Edna, that she was pregnant and widowed. I felt for her, and lowered my guard, she begged me to not let her baby die with her. I foolishly agreed and set her free. Three weeks later, I was fighting, hand to hand combat with a damn German. He faked a fall and five men ambushed me, they were all led by Edna. It took all of my strength, but I killed all five of the men… and let her live. I collapsed, I knew I was going to die, and I regretted nothing. I was ready to go, I welcomed it. But they didn't let me."

He looked away "I woke up, three weeks and two days later; there were monitors all around the room, I.V's all over my body, Men in lab coats talking and injecting me with a horrible burning liquid. I went mad with pain and hunger within only a few hours. I broke free of the restraints and ripped out the damn needles…" he explained, his eyes clouded with the ghost of his past "after I killed all of the lab men, I was shot with a tranquilizer, and I came too in my commander's office. He explained that I was no longer human, and that I should thank him for still being alive. He said I now was not a soldier, but a lethal assassin. And that the United Stated Government would like to have hired me. I agreed, took their money, and did as I was told.

The enemy wanted to use my… talents. I worked with them too. Soon I found that I was getting… sick. I shot some government official that knew too much. And his blood screamed to me, I found myself drinking his blood. The more I drank, the better I felt, the stronger I felt. His wife came in and screamed…" he looked away "I… couldn't control what happened anymore, I knew only that I would do something that I would regret, or I would kill her. So I killed her."

He sighed "I confronted a scientist, one who had worked on my project. He explained that I am not a human any longer, like the chief said, but he explained that I would desire strange things. Blood and sex. Both tied together, because of the chemicals reaction to both the pleasure center and the anger center. When I get angry, I kill, and I want only the blood, in every way. And I demand to be granted self gratification for my work. I am an animal, Robin" he reached a hand out, robin backed away, tears falling down his face. Slade jerked his hand away and stood "Rest now" his voice was cold again as he snapped his mask back in place "dinner will be done at six." He left the room.


	6. please free the Robin

Please free the Robin

It seemed to get worse, robin's growing desperation to get out. He refused his food at every meal, and fought Slade any time he entered. The first time had been confusing. The boy had leapt at him and struck out, crying, like a mad man. There was none of the usual beauty or grace that he used in a planned battle. Slade hit him once in the jaw, and sent the hunger weakened boy to the ground. He then straddled him and pinned him down, trying to gain control of the situation. Robin's eyes shifted into fear, and a lot of it. He shook like mad, screaming and trying to get out from under him. Slade understood, he was afraid, having flashbacks of what had happened almost a week ago, and fearing that Slade would rape him again. He quickly climbed off of him "I won't hurt you, Robin, not like that, not again… I'm going now." The boy just lay there, and, saves from the slight trembling of his body, did not move. Slade kept to his word and backed out, closing the door behind him. His first warning was a small alarm, the beeping coming from a small device hidden in his belt. He ran to the monitors. His second warning was three of four cameras seemed to have been broken. The third was the sound of a window being broken in the far end of his Lair. He knew who it was. The Batman himself! He was no fool, he knew the bat would come after him soon enough. He had thought of simply killing him and keeping it from his beloved little bird. But he couldn't do that now. And, as it was, he couldn't very well hand the boy over. The batman would take the boy and hide him. He would hide his Robin so that he could never again harm him. Well, the bastard was in for a fight then. Robin was HIS! Damn it, robin belonged to him! He walked calmly to the boy's room and held up a pair of pants "put some clothes on, and get in bed, we have company." Robin blinked, not sure what to think, but grateful for the covering as he slipped the garment on. He scrambled onto the bed as Slade approached "Just sit still. Don't say anything, don't do anything, I'll handle this." He sat behind robin and placed a hand on his chest. Batman ran in "Robin!" Robin's eyes widened "Batman?" he gasped then hissed as a dagger was pressed against his throat "Shhhh, my boy, I told you not to say anything." Slade smirked as absolute hatred passed the other man's face "Hello, Batman. Know this, my fight is not with you, the boy is mine."Batman's eyes narrowed "Your wrong, about everything. Robin belongs to no one, He is his own person. And if you have a fight with him, you have to fight me!" batman advanced. Slade pushed the dagger, actually breaking the boy's skin a bit "I don't think so." Batman stopped in his tracks, ready to listen "You want to protect him? I thought robin was a big boy." He chuckled, breathing hot air on robin's neck "he talks like one. Robin, do you need the bat here?" Robin gulped "Slade, please, don't…" he gasped as Slade clenched one of his still injured wrists, and looked down "I said, do you need the Bat?!" robin started shaking hard "I d-don't need anyone." Fear laced his voice, his fear that reopening the wound might make Slade's desire take control of him again. He didn't want Batman to die. And he didn't want to be raped again. Batman growled "you're Bluffing! You wouldn't kill robin." Slade's eyes narrowed "oh, wouldn't I?" Batman shook his head "You would have if you were going to. He's weak enough; you could have snapped him like a twig. He's hungry, tired, and exhausted. You want robin for your own, that's why he's alive. You couldn't kill him, without killing yourself!" Slade snarled "So, you called it, huh?" he suddenly laughed "yes, I won't kill him, however, I have no issues killing you!" he threw the dagger at batman's face. He caught it and flung it into the wall. Slade jumped to his feet and took a fighting stance "no weapons, they say you're strong enough not to need them." Batman took a stance as well "I hear the same of you." Robin watched helplessly as the two started to attack each other. Slade would kill Batman, he wasn't human. But batman could fight too, he was almost an equal to Slade, he wasn't sure who, but someone would be seriously hurt if he didn't act soon. But, what could he do? He was so damn weak. Maybe if he… He looked at the dagger stuck in the wall and picked it up. Neither man wanted him to die. He wanted to die. He could pull Slade from batman with his lust and Batman away from Slade with his fear for him. He suddenly couldn't help but laugh. It was all so silly! Really, Batman was here, right now, to save him from Slade. He was contemplating suicide to stop them from fighting and dear god, it was all too funny! His laugh turned into hysterics. Both men stopped fighting and stared at him. Batman remembered the empath saying something, she'd said 'I think his mind has snapped' Oh no, what did this man do to him!? "Robin? Here, hand me the knife, I can take you away from here." He spoke soothingly, inching closer. Slade snarled "the hell you will! ROBIN! Drop the knife now!" Robin smiled up at them. Yes, he was a hero, and he would keep his promise, he would never take any other human life "I won't hurt myself, my father taught me to throw daggers, right? Batman?"The black clad man nodded slowly "And If I were to throw this against that detonator, we would all die, wouldn't we?" Slade's eyes widened "Very well. Robin, go with him, but I will be watching you." He turned to batman "I will take him back; you cannot hide him from me." He disappeared through the door. Robin dropped the dagger and started to cry. Batman picked him up and held him close "Oh, Robin, what did he do to you?" Robin didn't answer, instead, he fell asleep against the hard chest of his familiar friend.


	7. The Birds and the Bees

The Birds and the Bees

CY gasped when Batman carried the half naked teen in "Oh dear god, Robin!" Raven looked up, and shuddered "your wrists…" Robin shook his head "I'm fine, Batman, set me down, and go home." Batman glared and shook his head "I'm sorry, I can't leave you alone in this condition." He set him on the couch "Friend robin has returned!" Starfire hugged him tightly. Robin gave a frightened sound and leapt away from her, breathing hard and shaking. "D...Don't touch me." He looked away in shame as all of his friends stared at him "what happened, man? Your wrists and your chest…" Robin put a hand over the band of wounds across his stomach "self inflected." He stated cautiously "I didn't even notice that I'd hurt myself until a little while ago. Slade didn't hurt me; I just got caught up in his schemes. End of story." Starfire protested "But, friend robin!" He cut her off "end of story." He closed his eyes "someone, order pizza, I've been eating healthy for about three weeks now." Cyborg gave a fake, worried laughed "yeah, that must have been torture." He walked to the kitchen are to make the call. "Now, I'm fine, Batman, go back to Gotham. They need you, right?" his face was tense and plastered with determination. "How cold, Robin. No, they don't need me right now; Superman is filling in for me while I rehabilitate your mind." He snarled "my mind is fine, and I own this tower, you are not welcome." Bruce laughed coldly "The towed is divided by all five of you, and they can choose whether or not to back you up." They all looked at the other four titans "as long as we don't know what's going on, I say, he stays." Cyborg said, and then looked sadly at robin "sorry man." He shrugged Raven nodded "I agree, just for a week or two, Robin." BB looked helpless "sorry, gotta agree with Batman, he's my hero!" Starfire glared around the room "only friend Robin can know what is good for himself! If he says he is fine, then he is fine! "Three say I stay, two say otherwise. Majority rules, Robin." Bruce said, taking off his cape "and I promise, I will leave as soon as you are actually ready for me to leave." Robin glared "I've had a long few weeks, I'm going to bed, someone save me a slice of pizza." He walked to his room and slammed the door shut "well… At least he's not upset." Bb joked, earning a throw pillow to the face.

~currently~

Slade sat in his newest lair, pondering his situation. He had, of course known that Robin would not throw his dagger at his old hand-built detonator, but he needed to be consoled, and only his friends and maybe the bat could do that. He had scared the boy, maybe even drove him to insanity. When he took the boy back, he had to have a better plan. Robin would train every day, outside. The boy needed his exercise, and keeping the bird caged for too long obviously had dire consequences. Also, he would have to find something entertaining for him, music, perhaps? Yes, maybe that would help. Something else, He needed comfort, maybe he could get an animal for him. A cat, or something like that would make him think too much of his friend, the green one. Anything that flew would make him think of that damned Bat, well, this was awkward. No pet, that's it, he would be the only comfort he'd needed. As soon as the boy could think straight again, he would take him back.

~back at the tower the next morning~

Robin stayed in bed, even after the sun had risen. This made all of the other titans anxious, but Batman assured them, that back in the day, Robin would sleep till noon after a big night, so he could very well sleep all day. Raven nodded "I sense his comfort, he is asleep still."

During lunch, Raven looked up from her tea "morning robin." Everyone else looked up. Robin, who was still wearing only a black pair of pants, nodded to her and lent against the wall, arms crossed "I have to go out today, let me know if anything happens, I'll be back as soon as possible." Bruce's eyes narrowed "Where are you going?" Robin's glare could've frightened just about anyone else "I'm a big boy, I think I can decide where or not to go." "I don't want you to go alone." Batman suddenly approached him, and gently put a hand on his shoulder "you should never be alone. Not during Christmas and not now." Robin's face registered slight shock; all of the others in the room just looked confused "That was a long time ago." Robin looked away "I LIKE being alone these days, I'm used to it." he shot, making Batman drop his hand.

"Fine, but I'm still coming with you, we'll take the bat mobile. " This comment made Robin snort, starting to get ticked "Batman?"

"Yes?" the man raised any eyebrow at Robin's sudden calmness

Robin took a deep breath "this is something I really don't want to discuss, ok?" Bruce smiled and shook his head "I'm not discussing it, let's go get in the car, I promise, I won't embarrass you."

Robin sighed and looked at him, then nodded. As they headed out, he suddenly stopped "I have to go as Dick Grayson; I need to see a doctor."

Bruce's eyes widened "A doctor? What's wrong?" Bruce asked as he pulled his street clothes out of the bat mobile. He pulled off his costume to his boxers and undershirt

"Nothing's wrong… I hope. I have to be examined, have a few blood tests… I would normally just ask Cyborg, but… I can't, not with this." He shook his head "I have to have a lot of tests done, so it will be boring, and long." He eyed the now clothed Bruce Wayne, hoping that he would decide to stay.

"I am a very patient man. What exactly are these tests?" his question made Dick pause in taking his mask off "it's personal, and you don't want to know"

Bruce tossed him a shirt "Richard, you've always been important to me, I need to know why you need blood tests, I need to know if and how your hurt!" Dick rolled his eyes "Yeah, I've always been so important, remember the day I left?"

Bruce glared and walked to the doctors with him "You said I didn't care, that I never asked you how you are. Well, I have good reason. You've never looked like you needed me to coddle you. You were always a strong, independent young man, and you have Alfred to make you food, what could I do for you then? Nothing! Now, you are hurt, you have to see a doctor, this is no normal check up, you are pail and it looks like you've done nothing but cry. I have every reason to never let you out of my sight again, now stop being defensive and talk to me!"

Dick looked him straight in the eyes, stopping right in front of the Doctors office "alright, if you really want to know; that bastard raped me, ok? He did, and I don't know if he carried anything. For all I know he was riddled with aids, and he wasn't wearing a condom. I'm afraid that I may be carrying something now. Happy?"

Bruce stared at him for a second, then suddenly pulled him to his chest and held him. It was then that Dick realized he was crying.

A few hours later

Richard was talking with the nurse. The room was soundproof, but there was a large window, one which Bruce watched to carefully gage Richard's reactions.

Richard kept nodding, his face grim. The nurse put a hand over his, smiling sadly and talked some more. After awhile, Richard stood, shook her hand and walked up to Bruce "its ok, I'm clean."

Bruce sighed in relief "Then why were you so upset looking?"

Dick looked away and mumbled "Because she was telling me about the birds and the bees… And condoms."

Bruce blinked twice then tilted his head back, laughing loudly.


	8. robins do not mate for life

Robins do NOT mate for life

It was three nights after the doctor's appointment, and robin was terrified. He sat up in the night, coated in a thin sheen of sweat as his eyes darted about the room. He was glad Raven had agreed to stop feeling what he felt; there was no reason to upset her. The dream was horrible. He had been fighting Red X, when suddenly the thief kissed him. He felt strange, and then, Red X died, and it was Slade who'd killed him. Slade put his blood coated hands on him, and said that he was sorry. Shaking his head to rid himself of the nightmare, he looked out the window, he knew there would be no point in crying; but, even as he thought to himself to stop freaking out, he felt the tears. Unable to hold back, he started sobbing, and wrapped his arms around himself. It was self torture, he knew. Not a thing could come of this, nothing would change. And damning himself for eternity, he wanted to see Slade again. He didn't want to fight him; he wanted to be held, to hear Slade tell him 'it's alright'. Something was wrong with him, there was only one thing it could be; He feared that he loved Slade. He sobbed into his pillow, biting on his knuckle to stifle the sound, slowly he laid back down, still crying, still shaking. He forced himself to stop sobbing.

Right outside Robin's door, Batman closed his eyes against the noise. If he went in to comfort him, it would only make matters worse. He knew this, but still, he wanted nothing more than to hold him and help him get away from that bastard in every way. In his mind, Slade would stay; he had no intention of leaving Robin be. Right now, Batman was at a loss, and robin would suffer with the lack of action. He shook his head and put his palm on the door, if only he could help. But this was Robin's mountain to climb, and he couldn't even climb it with him. If only that man hadn't broken the bird's wings.

~currently~

Red X watched the tower from afar, a smirk on his face "I hear you're back Robin, Let's have some fun tomorrow!" his grin spread as he lay back on top of the building.

~the next day~

Robin ignored breakfast in the order that the food was offered to him "Not hungry, going to train." He left for the room. The moment he arrived he called for training fifteen, nothing too heavy; after all, the doctor did say to take it easy. But just as the simulation started, it stopped. The tower's alarm had gone off. He ran out into the Living room "what have we got?" Cyborg typed on the large computer "looks like a master thief stole some jewels. It's from red X's favorite store." Robin stopped in his tracks, his face going blank "Titans, Go" he barley croaked. The other worriedly did as they were told. Robin glared at Batman "you stay here; Red is to me as The Joker is to you. He's MY battle." Those were his parting words. He bolted out the door, and jumped on his bike. About half way there, he was in a lot of pain. His stitches tore; more shocked than anything else, he jumped, shifting the weight of the bike. There was a horrible, metallic screeching noise, and Robin's motorcycle connected with a wall and crumpled, the gas tank was punctured and the entire bike caught flame in a matter of seconds.

"Wow, Close one, eh, birdie?" Red X had an arm around Robin; he'd pulled him off his bike just before it had fallen Robin stiffened and Red X set him down in an ally way

"I thought you were robbing a jewelry store right now." Robin said, staring at the other teen. Red X shrugged "or you could say 'thanks' No worries, I can take my shineys and still have time to save a damsel in distress before anyone even notices."

Robin glared "I will never thank a thief, and I am not a damsel!" Robin's obvious anger amused red X, he held his sides and laughed hard "ok then, you're not a damsel, but you were in distress!" he smirked and looked at Robin's bike "now, that's going to cost a pretty penny." He whistled at the damage to the bike.

Robin groaned at the flaming wreckage "I'll need an entirely new cycle!" he shook his head "my monthly allowances won't cover this!"

Red smiled at him "sucks to be you." Suddenly the other kid stopped teasing "dude, your bleeding." He pointed at Robin's wrists, the backs of which both had torn stitches "oh… yeah." He lifted them to examine, then shrugged "oh well."

Red X shook his head and looked around "I'm not going to fight an injured kid; kinda' messed up, even for me!" He snorted at Robin's pissed off expression "kid, look at yourself, I was looking forward to a good fight with you, but you look so… sad, I can't lift a finger against you… Until you heal at least, then it's open season on your bird ass." He smirked and cupped his cheek, and walked forward, backing Robin against a nearby building "Any way you want it." he smirked and stroked a shocked robin's face. Then he smacked his hand away "If you're smart, Red, you won't ever touch me again." The kid was pail as all hell, and his voice was dead serious

"What?" he smirked and jokingly put both hands on his sides "not in a playful mood? Birdie?" he laughed softly and put his masked cheek on robin's head. All the humor drained from him "Stop shaking, I'm not going to hurt you." He hugged robin gently to him "seriously kid, what's freaking you out so bad?"

Robin shoved him away, anger flaring "if you want to live, don't ever come near me again! Ok? He'll kill you!" he ran away as fast as he could, his chest screaming in protest, blood trailed down the back of his gloves and tears filled his masked eyes. But he didn't care. His dream suddenly felt so real. And he understood something, it had taken awhile, but he knew that he kinda liked Red X. Flirtatious thief he was, he made the fight all the more interesting… almost playful. He didn't want Red to get hurt, not because of him.


	9. fickle as a robin might be

Fickle as a Robin might be

Robin was sitting in his chair when the others got back, Batman was fixing the stitches, mumbling something "I said, I jumped, ok, drop it!" Robin snapped

Batman's face tightened, but he said nothing more.

"Oh, hey guys! Sorry I didn't show, I lost control of the bike and kinda' got in a wreck." He shrugged "I jumped before I got any damage, except my wrist." Starfire rushed forward "what?! You are sure you are not hurt, friend Robin?" Beast boy turned into a mouse and scuttled hi his leg and checked him for any injuries. Raven and Cyborg just stood there, staring at him with serious, prying, and almost frightened eyes. There was clear accusation coming silently from their still forms.

Were his mask off, his eyes would have revealed everything, including the guilt, and the pain. He looked away "get off, Bb, I'm fine." The little green rodent jumped off of him with a squeak and turned into a boy again "I don't know, you kinda have a smell on you..." he whispered thoughtfully "I can't put my finger on who it is, but… it smells like a male."

All eyes were on him, how embarrassing. "Yeah, I… kinda saw someone while I was out… It wasn't anything big, I just kinda saw him and said 'hi'" Bb shook his head "the smell is all over you, like he was… holding you, even your stomach smells like he had an arm around ya and stuff." Batman cut the stitching roughly, his face unreadable, but serious. "Robin, is there something you should tell your friends?"

Robin suddenly got very angry, he couldn't understand why, but he was pissed. He pulled his arm away "no, I don't. Stop playing the father, ok? You lost that act years ago!" Batman stood too, towering over him, his voice equally as angry "according to YOU, I was never a father, I was something else. If you want a dad, I'm here! If you want a hero, I'm here! But Robin, I cannot just sit back and watch you lie to your friends, I can't let you destroy yourself. You tell them right now, or I will!"

Robin looked away "there's no connection, ok? It wasn't Slade, so why should I care?!" Batman gaped "did you sleep with this other person?!"

Robin smacked him, hard. Everyone was frozen "I would never sleep around, Bruce, I'm not you. If I were with the guy that held me today, I would be with him alone, if I was with Slade, willingly, then I would never lead anyone else on, or use my good looks to get me any ware. I taught myself to do that, you know why? Because nothing hurts more, then to be led on, day after day by someone you care about. I like the guy, sure, but I care about him, so I won't lead ever see him in a romantic way. Please, leave me alone, stop giving me money, stop looking at me, stop thinking about me and get out of my life. I don't need you anymore!" he turned and walked to his room.

Raven looked mournfully at Batman "we'll pretend we didn't hear your real name. And he didn't mean it." Batman shook his head "yes, he did. I should have just brought him to the tower and left." The man sighed and grabbed his cape. "Wait, before you go, can I ask you something?" Ravens eyes were serious; she was right by him, awaiting the O.K to question him. He nodded and she took a breath "it's none of my business, but… Were you and Robin together?" Batman smiled softly and shook his head "no, I adopted him when he was nine, his parents had just died. I can't say too much, you know, secret identity and all. But I can say this, as I tried my damndest to see him as a son, or a sidekick, he saw me as his hero, the guy who saved him from himself, and he admitted that he was in love with me, I told him that if this was so, then he would quit fighting crime. He left that night, and said that the only to make me love him, was to do what he was best at. I think, even today, he still thinks he loves me. But he's not fighting for me anymore, his true love will now, always be this city, his city."

Raven nodded "what do we do if Slade comes back?"

Batman thought about it "then don't tell Robin, take care of the bastard yourselves, he will just give up, He only wants Robin, not any of the rest of you."

Raved helped him with his cape "and if Robin slips into hard depression?" Batman laughed loudly, and put a hand on her cheek "you know he's a bounce-back baby, he always has been. Even now, he's sad, but he will find a way to cope, you just help him, and I'm sure both of you will find what you're looking for." And he disappeared into the night.

Robin looked out into the night "I did find what I was looking for, and I lost it just as soon." She shut the door and made some tea. Ten minutes later, she was at Robin's bedroom door with two cups of Earl Grey,

He opened the door and invited her in; she was the only titan who was allowed in his room, and vice versa. "So, got a crush on batman, huh?" She smiled softly and set the cups down "nothing to be ashamed of, he cares about you almost as much as I do. And he's buying you a new bike, I saw him pulling out the card as he left."

Robin grumbled something about stubbornness, (as though he had room to talk) and sipped at his tea. "He told you about the night I left, I heard, but there is more to the story," he looked at her, trying to see how much he could tell her. Hell, he could trust no one more "I was nine years old, when my parents were in an accident, I went to report it to the police, but they were corrupt. If Batman hadn't stopped me, I would have easily been killed by gangsters. He saved my life. And I fell in love with my hero, the reason I left was for more than just him trying to get me to stop fighting crime, it all led back to that day. The accident my mom and dad died in, was no accident at all, it was sabotage, a threat to the guy that they worked for. I found out that Batman wasn't looking for a sidekick when he found me, but he took me on anyway. And I do love him, more then he can ever know. But, he is straight, he's a playboy, and to him, I'm just some weak, vulnerable kid. I didn't used to be, not until the Joker shot me." He shirted and showed her the bullet wound "It had been the worst thing to happen to me, until recently." He shook his head and drank more tea "that's why I left batman, to prove that I'm not weak. But now, I wonder if maybe, just maybe, I might not be as strong as I'd thought." He looked into his cut, eyebrows drawn together in concentration "Raven, have I lost my mind?"


	10. the song of a Robin's mate

**The song of a Robin's mate**

"Robin, you are not crazy, you're scared, and a little disturbed. I want you to tell me what's wrong, but I don't think you will, and I won't press you."

Robin smiled softly and took another sip of his tea "I'll tell you if you guess right. But I might freak a bit."

Raven considered this "did you and Slade… Um, have sex?" she blushed.  
"Yes," he said harshly, his eyes shut tightly.  
She looked sad "and you weren't willing?"

"No." he whispered again, and looked away.

Raven took a sip of her tea "hmm, I guess I'll have to protect you then. No, it's not that I think that you can't handle it… But, do you remember when you saved me from my father?"

He nodded slightly and she continued "Well, he's a monster, but you took care of me anyway, even knowing what I am. I want to help you, my best friend, so that, one day, we can get both of them back for what they did to us."

A small smile crossed Robin's face "I thought of a way to heal from the whole 'Slade' thing, I think I need to not be afraid of sex, you know? I just need to have it with someone else, and see if it's not so horrible when it's willing on both ends."

Raved blinked, "O.K and do you know any gay willing guys?"

Robin smirked, with a blush, and nodded, "Yeah. I don't think I should though… I don't know; I should focus on hero things, not guys… especially since I am one."

Raven laughed and patted his hand, "no, you should do whatever you think will help, and there is NOTHING wrong with being gay." She mumbled with a slight blush, "but, who were you thinking of?"

Robin smirked again "Red X. but it would have to be some place extremely private, and no one but the three of us could know about it. If Slade found out, I think he might actually kill red X."

Raven sat still, thinking, "You really are into the bad boys, huh? Well, I'll help anyway; you choose the place and I'll relay a message for him to meet you, if you change your mind, then all you have to do is not show up." She decided the entire thing as she took a deep drink of her tea, the scalding heat keeping her emotions under control. Batman left at the wrong damn time.

Robin thought and shook his head "I don't need my hand held, I can handle it myself." He smiled and handed her the empty mug "I'm going to go to sleep now."

Raven took the hint and left "good night, robin." She closed the door behind her. 

The next day, there was a robbery. Robin knew who it was, and where he was. He had known that Red X would try to talk to him again. And for once, he was thankful to the jewel thief. He would do this. He HAD to get over the whole 'sex fear' thing, and that would be with the ability to enjoy it. He genially cared for the thief. He was foolish, but so damn fun to fight with.

The moment he found out what the alarm was, he hopped on his new bike (a generous donation from Wayne industries) and rode until he was three blocks from the store, informing the Titans that he could handle it himself.

"Hello birdie, nice bike." Red smirked, leaning against a wall "you came alone? How do you plan on catching me by yourself?"

Robin stared at him "I don't plan on catching you; at least, I don't plan on taking you to jail." He mumbled "X, why do you always flirt with me?"  
Red X stared at him, the mask hiding his expression "ok, a deep conversation, I guess, but it's because I love you."

He shrugged "always have. I was a kid when I first heard of Batman's new sidekick, Robin, the Boy Wonder. You were so brave, and handsome. And you fought for the weak and down trod. I went to Gotham, once, in hopes of seeing you, just a glimpse. Then I heard a gunshot."

Red X looked at the wall above them "when I saw ya, kid. My heart broke."

His voice was stone cold "I thought you were dead. So I felt a bit of myself die that day too. And I ran away from home, permanently, and came back to Jump city. Oh, I was relieved when you came,"

He walked to robin and gently ran a hand down his face "I was a master thief by then, and I was proud of it. Then you built this amazing costume, and you know; I can't let a good thing go to waste."

Robin smiled softly, "you love me?"  
He got his answer when X crushed his thin lips to Robin's with bruising force and passion.


	11. Nature's Romance

_**Nature's romance  
**_  
Robin's eyes widened of their own accord and he gasped, slightly surprised,  
into Red's mouth. He slowly returned the kiss, and, cautiously, he wrapped  
his arms around him.

Red lightly nipped at his lip, smirking "what's with all of this, kid?"

He ran a hand through Robin's hair "What is it you want?" Robin frowned  
slightly "I need your help. Let's make a deal, ok?"

Red rose an eyebrow "what kind of help?" his voice was cautious, and  
slightly troubled

Robin shook his head "not here, let's go some ware else." He took  
Red's hand and guided him to a low-profile apartment "I bought this place  
when I first got here, my second night in jump city." He looked at the  
thief, who was scanning the small one-room apartment "And you need help  
here?" the thief inquired.

Robin took a breath "you get a lot out of this deal, I think. I just want  
you to sleep with me, one night, that's it. No attachments, no  
commitment." His face was serious, and his body was tense.

Red shook his head and cupped Robin's cheek "what would you get out of it?  
What would I have to give you in return?" Robin swallowed hard "nothing,  
just as long as you don't tell anyone."

Red shook his head again "I don't really play like that, kid. I wouldn't  
like to just leave you in the morning, besides, I'd have to take off my  
costume, you'd know who I am and all of that. You aren't just trying to  
trap me, are you?"

Robin shook his head "no, I wouldn't do that. Besides, I already saw half  
of your face, when you kissed me. I'm not asking for anything hard or  
expensive, I'll even keep the lights off, so we can't see each other's  
identity."

Red sighed "why? I'm sure you aren't just looking to get some cheap  
thrill out of ** your worst enemy, so why would you come to me for  
something like this?"

Robin mumbled, almost to himself "you aren't my worst enemy." he shook  
his head, trying to clear his mind "look, if you don't want to have sex  
with me, then just say no and stop asking questions! It's now or never, Red  
X. Choose."

Red pinned him, suddenly, to one of the room's walls "first off, birdie, I  
never said I didn't want to have sex with you, second, I don't want the  
lights off and third, why are you shaking again?"

Robin clenched his teeth to stop the trembling "I don't know"  
He sighed and nuzzled Red's chest "you're warm." He suddenly said, regaining  
control over his fears. His comment made red laugh "yeah, all part of  
wearing a black costume in the sun.

He gently tugged at Robin's utility belt  
"are you sure about this, kid?" Robin nodded and ran his hands up Red's  
chest "as sure as I'll ever be."

Red took off his own mask, revealing red hair, a flawless, pail face, and the  
most beautiful green eyes

"Even If you do know what I look like, you'll never be able to find me." He murmured, letting his eyes run down Robin's body. He un-clicked the other boy's utility belt and let it drop to the  
floor "let's see the bed, ok?"

Robin nodded and walked to the room, one bed, one desk, that was all there was  
to it. Red smiled, it was so plain, just as Robin tried to be, so calm and  
empty. But that wasn't so. He didn't know what happened to the kid, but he  
knew this was going to be an interesting night. He would make Robin tremble in  
a different matter entirely. .He took the rest of his own costume off, leaving  
on only his boxers, watching the other teen as he did so, gauging his  
reaction, but all he showed was calmness, and slight interest.

Red smirked and searched the room with his eyes "hey, kid, do you have any lube?"  
Robin motioned to his utility belt, nodding slightly "In there." Red grabbed it quickley and coated a finger and thrust it into him, earning a surprised but pleased little gasp from the young hero. He smiled and kissed robin's neck as he put in a second finger, then a third.  
Robin arched up, gasping at the contact. Red x took off the rest of his under clothes and lathered a generous amount of the lubrication on his own shaft before pressing into Robin.  
He greedily moved, not noticing robin tense, and taking in the short, quick breaths as a sign of enjoyment rather then fear.  
Robin clenched his eyes tightly, trying not to freak out. This is what he wanted. This time, he had a say in what was happening to him. He heard Red say something, he couldn't quite make it out, but he knew it was sweet. He felt the tempo increase, and knew he was about to cum. It was Red X, he knew this, but when he looked up at him, he saw Slade. Though Red was much more gentle, and so much warmer about the entire situation, kissing all over his body and holding him tightly; though his body knew the difference, his mind was screaming, and scared. It was just the same to his stupid, stubborn mind. He... he was terrified. He covered his mouth with his hand.  
Red came deep inside him, moaning at his partner, and gently kissed the old bullet wound on his chest  
"Heh, kid, you're shaking again. Was it that good?" He looked  
up and his smirk fell. Robin had one arm wrapped around himself; the other  
still covering his own mouth, stifling the sobs that threatened to break free,  
tears caressed his beautiful face.  
The boy wonder was crying.


	12. The mending of the Robins heart

_**The mending of the robin's heart**_

Robin turned his head quickly, closing his eyes tightly.  
Red X shook his head, not quite understanding how the boy beneath him could be in any pain. He'd been gentle, and slow. What more could he have done? Or… what could have been done to Robin? He had to know; he had to ask. "Hey, kid. Didn't like it?" he tried to joke, knowing that it wouldn't help much. "Robin, look at me."  
Said boy clenched his eyes tighter "I'm sorry, Red. I'm sorry. Now you could be in danger, and for nothing. My experiment failed. I'm sorry!" he tried to get up, but a blurred pail arm wrapped around him  
Red held him closely "experiment? Danger? You aren't making much sense kid. Wanna start from the beginning?" Robin shook his head. "Please, just let go. Please." His voice broke and a sob wretched its way through his raw throat "you don't want to know."  
Red shook his head "I want to know everything about you. I want to know what's going on, who hurt you?" Robin winced "no one. Nothing, there is nothing to know."  
Red X growled and kissed him fiercely, tangling a hand in his hair and tightened his grip around his waist "I might not be the hero, Robin, but let me do something good, for once, let me save you." He whispered into the other teen's hair.

~-~-~-~-~currently~-~-~-~-~

Raven ignored everyone's looks and sipped her tea, staring out the window.  
"Please friend Raven, ware has Robin gone?" Starfire's eyes had the sheen of tears slicking each worried orb  
Raven sighed and set her cup down "Look, I said he's safe… there isn't much I am at liberty to say, but trust me, he's doing what he has to do. If you want the old Robin back, then be happy he's not here right now, because all our pressuring and pleading was only hurting him. Every question he was asked, every worried look you gave him, it broke him a little bit more. He's in pain, guys, and he's trying to let the pain go, but misery is a leach. It steals your joy, your love, your hate, even your memories. Once someone is in such inner turmoil, it takes a lot of work to climb out. Not the kind of work he's used to either. He can't throw a few punches and make his inner demons go away. It will take strength of the mind and heart, and both are injured right now. The healing process will make him hurt even more, and we can't see him like that, he doesn't want us to, and I, for one, wouldn't want to see it. Do you all understand?"  
Beast boy blinked and his eyes shifted to the floor "I think your saying that we need to give him some space, that he's alone, and that's how it has to be… right?"  
Cyborg smiled softly "that's exactly what she means Bb; let's go get some pizza and video games. Take our minds off of things for a bit."  
Starfire nodded "if we have to leave friend Robin alone, then let us enjoy our day." She floated off; everyone stared after her, pity in their eyes. Raven just sighed "I'm going to go to my room now. If I hear your game, I'm killing the power." She warned and left in the opposite direction of Starfire.

~.~.~.~.~currently~.~.~.~.~.~

Slade clenched his fist glaring at the screen in front of him. He'd know not to let his little bird free! Damn it! Damn it all to hell! He had showed the boy who he was, what he'd been through. That meant nothing to him! Now he was off with some unknown brat in a stolen costume. He had tapped into the city's security system and searched valiantly through each video feed, hoping his little bird hadn't done something stupid. When he saw the little freak making out with HIS robin HIS little toy HIS property!  
Someone was going to pay. And he knew just the foolish child that would fall at his wrath. Little X would suffer; oh, would he suffer!  
His fist clenched and he stormed off to prepare for his approaching visit to the pathetic, foolish little thief.

~;~;~currently~;~;~

Robin closed his eyes and relaxed against Red "why would you love me? Why?" more tears fell "you don't even know who I am, what I've done, you don't even know my name."  
Red sighed and kissed his forehead, seating both of them on the bed, still holding him tightly "sorry, kid, to answer your question with another question, but in this case, it's needed. Why do you save people you don't know, of put people in prison when you don't know their background? Why do you try your hardest to stop me? I'll tell you why. It's because of who you are, and what you do. It's because of what you feel. You feel compassion, and you don't know why. You lose sleep, just to make sure everyone sleeps peacefully, knowing you protect them. I love you because of your compassion, your fire. I love you because my gut feeling says you're the one for me, it says I need you, like air. I may not be a poet or anything like that, but I can honestly say that if there is a 'the one' then you're mine, baby!" he grinned like a fool "and I will do anything to become yours."  
Robin smiled, he didn't know why, but he started to laugh, even through his tears, he laughed. He turned and kissed Red X with all of his passion. All of his fear, all of his sorrow, and all of his… love; all of it was poured into his kiss, and all of it was returned, with equal passion.


	13. welcome back to your cage

WARNING! This will contain delicious lemons of sladin goodness. Special thanks to my Beta, MyHeroRaven . Ty for all the help so far! ^.^ Read on. And enjoy. Thank you

&*&^*&^*&^*&^*&

_**Welcome back to your cage**_

Robin sighed shakily, breaking the kiss. "Thank you, Red," he smiled through his still falling tears "for everything, really."  
Red smiled sadly "If you really want to thank me then tell me what happened. And who was 'He' the man who you said would kill me, cuz' I'd really like to meet him… is he why you were afraid? Why you were so scared after we had sex?" the thief pressed, gently stroking the hero's cheek  
Robin's face hardened "you don't want to know." He paled considerably "oh my god… he already knows. And he's going to kill you. He's going to kill you because of me." He mumbled and started shaking "I'm an idiot. I seriously thought there wouldn't be any consequences, but I know he knows. I don't know how, but he does."  
Red X shook his head; the kid was starting to freak him out "no one knows were together tonight, honestly. It's impossible, right? Calm down Robin, there's nothing to be afraid of." He gently rubbed the other teen's back, wondering if he was right. He didn't see anyone in the ally, or in the streets. No one could have been there, not even a mouse could have scuttled by without either of them noticing; after all they were trained professionals in their own fields. No, Robin was just freaked because of whatever this Psycho did to him. Whoever 'He' was, he was going to pay!  
Robin climbed out of the bed and dressed before Red could truly react. As he pulled his spandex on he looked Red X in the eye "he raped me." He admitted shortly and left poor Red to absorb the information.  
Red closed his eyes, everything pieced together. His poor bird, poor Robin. Life was so cruel, wasn't it? He closed his eyes and started to dress. He loved the boy still. He always would. And the man would do more than pay for hurting Red's Love, the one who had raped the young hero would die, if he had any say in it.  
~.~.~.~later that day~.~.~.~  
Slade had just finished planning when his alarm sounded; he had an intruder… interesting. He checked his monitors, and to his utter shock, Robin rode directly to his door and parked his bike in some shrubbery.  
Robin slowly walked in the building. He had put an innocent by standard in danger, and one who loved him too. He had to do whatever it took to keep Red X safe… along with all of jump city. He couldn't fight it/ He could feel his sanity slipping a little more every day; he actually wanted to be around Slade, to hear him, see him, and even feel his ice cold skin. Yes, he had to be crazy, that was all there was to it. Even if his odd need for the villain was not present, his love of his city, his endearment to Red X, everything he knew would have sent him back here, to the place of his rape, to the home of his most hated enemy, into the arms of his nightmare. What an f***ed up life. He walked in, knowing that he needn't knock, Slade already knew he was here, he always knew everything. Always.  
He walked into the monitor room and saw Slade looking over a few papers. He, ever so slowly, approached the man from behind and encircled his arms around the murderer, closing his eyes tightly.  
"Welcome back, Robin. Did you miss me?" He slowly turned, not wanting to startle him, but trying his hardest not to kill the little slut ware he stood.  
Robin nodded his head numbly and nuzzled into the man's chest.  
This shocked Slade almost as much at the boy's arrival had. He gently placed a hand on his head, letting his anger melt away. He swallowed his pride and creased the back of the boy's neck with his thumb "let's get you some food."  
He studied Robin as they entered the kitchen and cooked him a meal of vegetables and skinless chicken breasts.  
Robin ate silently, barley even looking at his plate.  
"I'm not sure what I'm going to do with you right now, Robin. Why did you come back so willingly?"  
Robin swallowed his food and set his fork down, then stared up at the man "I don't know." He tilted his head, examining Slade as if this was the first time he'd ever seen him "I honestly can't answer you." He shook his head and looked at the wall in front of him.  
Slade blinked, how un-Robin of him, such an unsure tone and reply… It disturbed him. He clicked off his mask and gently kissed the boy's forehead. Robin tensed. Good, maybe he could break him of this… submissive, scared little boy, and resurrect the feisty, intense teenager he needed so. He kissed Robin on the lips.  
Robin tensed even more, but closed his eyes. There was no reason to fight. Bad things happened when he fought. He opened his mouth, leaning into the kiss, picturing Red instead of the much larger man that tangled his arms around him.  
Robin moaned into his mouth and clang to him, still shaking, still terrified, yet wanting more; so much more.  
Slade picked him up and carried him to a room with a much larger bed. This must have been Slade's sleeping place.  
"I've thought of a way to help you. I know I've made you scared, and disgusted. But, I have decided to allow you to do what I've never allowed anyone to do. It will lessen your fear of me and of sexual acts."  
Robin's head snapped up in full attention, now he wanted to know what the man had to say.  
Slade laughed and set him on the bed, then undressed himself, then robin. He grabbed a bottle by his bed and started to lather himself "I trust you don't need preparation, Mister X should have done that already today." He glared as he stroked himself to full length  
Robin winced and looked away "yeah, he did."

Slade smirked "don't worry, you came back, that's all that matters… for now, at least." His voice laced with a threat. He moaned softly as he touched himself "I'm not going to rape you robin, you are going to climb on me willingly, and you will be in control of this situation." He laid down, flat on his back "I won't even touch you unless you ask for it, o.k.?" Robin nodded and climbed him. Now, Red X was in no way small. But Slade was still bigger by far he lowered himself on him, wincing slightly and stared at the man beneath him.  
Slade smiled and put his hands on the head board behind him, showing he had every intention to keep his promise not to touch him. "You do feel wonderful Robin." He said calmly, with an edge of sensual excitement tinting his words.  
Robin blushed and moved his hips, letting out a gasp. This felt wonderful, he didn't even have to think of someone else, he liked the way this one man felt under him, in him, even the soft, encouraging moan he got out of the older male as he tested himself with another jerk of his hips. Robin moaned softly "t...tell me if I hurt you."  
Slade laughed deeply and smiled "doubtful you will, my love." He moved a hand toward him, but stopped short, remembering his promise.  
"It's o.k. Slade, one hand on my hip or face, but nothing else."  
Slade smiled and ran his hand down his face "alright." He creased the young man's lower lip "you can move, now, love."  
Robin rocked his hips back and forth, moaning as he did so. He let out a gasp as Slade's tip poked something inside of him that sent his whole being bursting with pleasure "OH!" he threw his head back and moved his hips faster.  
He heard Slade swear in pleasure under him "so good, my little bird, so good. F***!"  
Somehow, this turned Robin on even more and he started to lift himself lightly then slam back down on Slade's lap. He repeated the act a few times, moaning and withering on him. He lent over Slade until his face was right in front of his. He braced himself on his hands and twisted his hips as he jerked them swiftly. He Bit the older man's neck as he continued his pace.  
Slade's hand came to rest on his hip as his both breathed heavily and sweat coated all of the entwined skin. "Slade, I'm… I'm going to…"  
Slade nodded "me too, my young love!" He groaned, gritting his teeth "me too."  
Robin laid on him and moved his hips faster, pulling at the assassin's hair as he did so.  
Soon, the hero saw sparks as he came all over both of their stomachs and chests.  
Slade wrapped his arm around him and kissed the boy's forehead "oh, my beautiful bird."  
Robin closed his tear filled eyes and fell asleep, right there, on his enemy, with his enemy's member still inside of him


	14. As the sun sets, the bird cries

As the sun sets, the bird cries

Slade was cooking breakfast when Robin woke up; the smell of turkey bacon and breakfast potatoes filled the room. 

He searched around for his clothes and glared when his eyes met the orange and black spandex clothes folded at the foot of the bed. He could put them on, he could let Slade win. Or… he could defy him, and see what happened.

He decided to just ware the damned costume.  
He wasn't afraid of Slade, he didn't think the man would kill him, and he felt as though Slade didn't want to make him scared, he just couldn't control it.  
He just pulled on his boxers. At least Slade had left them there.  
The moment Robin sat at the table Slade put a plate in front of him, his mask stared down at him "eat, then you can use my training facilities, after lunch we can discuss this whole Red X thing."  
Robin looked down "there isn't anything to discuss. I was just curious."  
Slade glared "that isn't an excuse! Not for him and certainly not for you!" he slammed his fist on the table. Robin jumped and shut his eyes tightly.

Slade took in his form "what were you curious about? Seeing how much pleasure you could get in a week?!" he snarled  
Robin shook his head "I wanted to see if it would be the same with him" Robin lied easily "I wanted to see if it felt the same. It didn't…" he looked up at him "you're not clumsy; you know what you're doing."  
Slade tilted his head "is that so?" at the nod of Robin's head he calmed down enough to sit "does that disturb you?"  
"Yes" Robin nodded, one truth; that had disturbed him greatly. The man was skilled, and with his… illness… it was not a good thing, how much experience the assassin seemed to have "more then you know."  
Slade shook his head "eat, train, then we can talk, after lunch or in the shower, your choice." A hint of dark humor laced his words.

~*~*~*~*~currently~*~*~*~*~

Raven was sipping her tea. She hadn't been happy that morning when she'd found Robin still gone. Something just felt so wrong. She refused to connect to Robin's emotional energy. The last time she had, she'd nearly brought down the tower. Her powers were so unstable under too much emotion, especially pain. She hadn't lied when she's said sorrow was an emotional leech. Last she's checked, he was still drowning in a wave of it. It shook her to the bone.  
But there was nothing she could do, not with this at least. She watched the sun rise and set again, it wasn't until the alarm went off that she got really worried.  
"Yo! Rae, it's Red X, He's robbed his usual haunt! Roger's Riches!"  
"That's impossible." She went to the city scanner "Titans, Let me handle this." She left before anyone could say otherwise.  
She got to Red X just as he tried to get away "Oh, You're not my little birdie, no fun!" the masked boy looked around "ware is the kid?"  
Her eyes widened "he's not with you? But…" she closed her eyes "Oh God, not good."  
She turned, but Red X grabbed her arm "what's not good? Ware's Robin?!" he demanded fiercely, a strangely protective edge in his voice.  
Raven sighed "I think he ran away, I'm not sure though." She shook her head again "I have to talk to the titans." She pulled her arm out of his grasp and started to float away "what should I do?" Red X called. Raven looked down at him "stay out of it." then she floated off  
~*~*~*~*~Back to Sladin~*~*~*~*~

Robin spent most of the morning training and went to lunch the moment it was called "how about Pizza?" he grinned and sat down  
Slade glared "I will never allow greasy filthy unhealthy food in my home. We are having a three cheese vegetarian lasagna and milk unless you'd prefer water?"  
Robin glared "I'll take the milk." He said and accepted the glass and plate. He soon found that health food, while was no match for pizza, still wasn't so bad.  
"You stink, Robin, we'll be taking a shower after lunch, then we'll have that conversation." Slade said, clicking off his mask to eat as well "and you can forget about putting your hair up in those ridicules spikes." He shook his head with a smirk as Robin's glare burned holes into Slade's head "I don't have the hair gel for it." Slade said as he ate properly  
"Ok, you are officially too old to be having sex with a teenager. No greasy, delicious pizza, no hair gel. Next you're going to tell me that you don't own a VCR"  
Slade smirked at him "I don't" He picked up the dishes and cleaned them in the sink while Robin stared at his back, mouth agape "What do you do for fun?!"  
The assassin smirked "as of late, you."  
Robin blushed hard and fallowed Slade as he led him to a bathroom.  
They had a lot in common, including the preferred temperature of their showers: steaming hot.  
Robin was still embarrassed to be seen naked by anyone, especially Slade. He shimmied off his boxers and jumped in the shower while Slade took his armor off. The older man only smirked at this and soon fallowed in as soon as he was naked. He started shampooing his own hair, completely ignoring the boy as he did the same.  
Robin dreaded what was to come. A conversation about Red was one thing he'd rather avoid. In actuality, Robin had never really seduced anyone before, except for that one thing with red… which really didn't count in his mind. But, he figured that, if it would help his cause, he would distract Slade in the only way the man could be distracted; Pure, unadulterated lust. He bent over and grabbed a bar of soap, only hoping that Slade noticed.  
Oh, Slade noticed alright, he eyed the boy as he lathered himself and ran his hands over himself, working in the cleaning bubbles. He noticed when Robin bend back over and set the soap bar back down. If he didn't know the young hero any better, he'd say that he was tempting him on purpose.  
"Slade?" Robin asked, blushing a deep red, weather it was the water or actual embarrassment; he wasn't sure "Yes Robin?"  
Robin put a hand on his chest, his face getting a slight bit pinker "Can we try that again? Ware, I'm in control?"  
Slade stiffened, then chuckled darkly "Let's get this straight, you may be on top, but you are Never in control, realize, I could do so much from the bottom, I'm still inside you, remember that, my little Robin." He stroked his cheek gently "and it would be quite hard in here… Maybe we should move to a more comfortable area?"  
Robin nodded and nuzzled the older man's chest.  
Slade shut off the water and toweled himself off, then started drying Robin, taking care around his hips and nether region. After they were dry he walked, naked back to his room and Robin fallowed.  
"You will be top for as long as I care this time, then I will roll us over and teach you new things, if you become scared, tell me immediately, for, I may lose control if not warned in time. Do you understand?"  
Robin looked pale "please, let's just do it the other way… I'm not ready for anything else yet." He admitted, looking down.  
Slade gently cupped his cheek "we'll do it your way only once more, Robin, we have to get you over your fear."  
Robin looked up at him and nodded, then climbed on the bed "and you only get to touch me with one hand, face or hip, right?"  
"I believe that is our agreement, Robin." Slade nodded and laid on the bed as well, belly up.  
Robin smirked and straddled him. He started to move the moment a well-oiled Slade was inside of him, he even let out an early moan. Hey, Slade was big, he felt immediately good!  
Slade moaned as well and put only one hand on his hip, urging the teen to move faster.  
Robin complied.  
"Oh, god!" Robin hissed and moved his hips faster. Suddenly, he hated himself. He loved The way Slade felt in him, and his hand on his hip and his voice… oh, his voice, it was warm and soft, like a silk comforter. His voice that has hurt him so, his hand that had hit him, yet, still, it was thrilling! He wanted more. And for that, he was ashamed. He came hard onto his own stomach, moaning.

Slade smiled and pulled him down for a kiss "continue, my Robin, I'm not finished yet."

Robin complied, moving slowly, exhausted. But his little moans of near pleasure-pain sent the masked man off anyhow.

Robin collapsed by him, and as he heard the deep breathing of his bed partner, he cried, silently, and softly.

_Oh, what am I becoming?_

And he slept


	15. Mourn for the egg, moun for the flock

_**Mourn for the egg, mourn for the flock**_

Raven was pacing the room, looking at the others as they waited, patiently, for the meeting to begin "O.K!" she said, standing right in the middle of the room "Robin had to see someone, about his… problem. However, it seems that he left, and he didn't come back here. Any ideas of where he could have gone?"

BB blinked and raised his hand, raven nodded for him to talk "Maybe he went back to Batman? I mean, Robin we like his son, right? Maybe he went back."

Cyborg shook his head "remember how he acted the last time he saw Batman? It was pretty bad."

"No, BB's actually right, Cy, I mean, think about it, maybe he regretted the way he treated him or something. We won't know for sure unless we ask the Dark Knight himself. So, who's going to make the call this time?"

BB ran to Robin's room and grabbed the communicator "why not?" he smiled and pressed the button.

Batman didn't answer for two long minutes, but when he did, there were police in the background of his face "Oh, the green boy, Beast Boy, right?"

Beast boy grinned "yep!"

"What do you need?"  
Beast boy looked at the communicator "We were wondering, you know if you'd seen-"

Robin turned his head, his eyes narrowing "Hold on, BB, It looks like the Joker escaped again." He started talking to one of the officers, and then turned back to the communicator "I'm sorry, you were saying? "

Beast boy blinked "the joker? You just fought the joker?!"

Raven glared and nabbed the communicator from him "Hey Batman, it Robin with you?"

At this, Batman took a deep breath "no."

The silence after that was deafening.

Beast boy lost all of his humor, replaced by seriousness and depression "He's gone again, it's been a few days this time."

Batman looked at Raven "have you tapped into his emotional waves?"

Raved closed her eyes and shook her head "I… I can't."

"Why?" Batman asked.

Raven looked away "if it was at all like last time, I could very well kill us all. " She looked at the communicator "Robin is my best friend, his pain affects me the worst."

Batman nodded "I see. Don't press yourself." He looked away "I can't come to jump city right now, The Joker is on the loose. Once I catch him, I promise to come assist you."

Raven nodded "we don't think there's anything shady going on here, he may have run away, worst case scenario."

Batman thought on it "Wouldn't be the first time. Alright, keep me informed."

Raven nodded "Will do, sir." She closed the communication "alright, let's collect some information on the streets."

They took off in all different directions

()~()~()~()~currently()~()~()~()~

Robin was poking at his omelet "Slade is it ok if I train again today?"

He nodded as he ate his own "as long as you want, just come up for meals, ok?"

He nodded and ate.

As soon as he hit the training room, he pressed the button on the wall that Slade had shown him, it would release three Slade bots at a time, for hand-to-hand combat. As soon as he turned, three robots were on him. He took them out in about five minutes. He pressed the button twice, three, four more times; twelve came out to fight him.

After a few hours, he came up for food. Slade was on the phone "I see, and when will they be coming over?" he waited, listening to whomever was on the other line "Alright, I'll be ready." He hung up and turned to Robin "hello, my little bird. After you eat, I need you to take a shower, then go to my bedroom, and promise not to come out."

Robin blinked "why?" he sat down

Slade tilted his head "I have… company coming over, and I don't think you should meet them it would be unpleasant for all of you."

Robin sighed and ate his soup and sandwich.

*later*

Robin went into Slade's bedroom and lay on the bed. He was almost asleep when he heard two gunshots, one right after the other. He jumped up and ran out the door "Robin, don't come downstairs." Slade called calmly up to him "Let me clean up this mess first."

Robin shuddered and crept down the stairs. Slade bots were carrying away two large black bags, and one Slade bot was mopping up what looked like blood. Robin looked at him, pail and horrified "you… killed people?!"

Slade nodded "yes." He set the gun down on a table "They were trying to cheat my client, so he sent them here with the fifteen thousand dollar fee I charge for double assassination. This was only too easy, they even paid for their own deaths." He chuckled darkly and turned to face him "I told you to stay in my room, Robin, did I not?" he hissed coldly

Robin swallowed down the lump building his throat "why… Why Slade?!" he yelled, anger, sorrow and fear bubbling up as one in his chest. "What is wrong with you?! You invited men over so you could kill them?!" he ran at him, only to receive a rather painful blow to the gut before Slade pinned him face first on the ground, straddling his lower half and pilling the boy's arms behind his back

"It's all in my job description, I am an assassin. I kill for money. All the way from presidents and dukes to common lowlifes like them." He forced Robin to look at the black bags that were being dragged out

"I… I hate you." Robin said

Slade laughed "you should go now, Little Bird, their blood is getting to me." He climbed off of him and stalked away "hurry, though. You are rather tempting at the moment."

Robin closed his eyes and ran to his room and locked the doors. As if that would do any good. If Slade had wanted in, he would just break the door down.

Robin shuddered and climbed on his bed, shaking and sobbing.

He wanted Batman, he wanted Red, and He wanted his long since dead parents.

He wanted to disappear. No one would suffer AND he wouldn't have to be with a murderous sick twisted experiment gone wrong.

He cried himself to a troubled sleep.


	16. Robin served rare

_**Robin served rare**_

Robin tossed and turned, crying and screaming. Slade pressed his forehead against the boy's door '_what now?'_ He sighed. It had been three days since the incident, and every day, Robin would eat as fast as he could, sometimes skipping his meals altogether, then he would go train, shower, eat and go to bed, avoiding Slade as often as possible, and every night he would scream and cry. He had broken his bird again.

There was nothing that he could do now, except shower his love with attention… and he knew something that would make him smile.

The next day started the same, Robin ate quickly then rushed to train, he skipped lunch, and then came up for dinner.

Slade smiled behind his mask "hungry?" Robin shrugged "I guess."

Slade pulled a pizza box out of the oven "extra cheese, pepperoni and black olives." He set the box down

Robin grinned from ear to ear "I thought you didn't let greasy food in your house?"

Slade smiled "For this once, I will make an exception." He put the food on a place and kissed the top of Robin's head as the boy dug in, eating with joy.

Slade sat across from him and ate his salad.

*^*^*^*^*^currently*^*^*^*^*

Red stocked through town, getting all the information possible. People had seen Robin on his bike almost a week ago, they said he'd left town going east. From that information, he called on a few people who owed him favors, getting more information; all he knew now was that the trail ended some ware past the fare grounds but before the mountains. So, he was covering everything in between.

He took to camping outdoors so that he could get straight to work the next day. There were 34 miles to cover in that general area, unless Robin headed to the right, where there was open space leading to another nearby city. He sighed as he set up his tent. He had searched for fourteen hours that day, now; he was exhausted, and knew he would be no good in this state.

He finished putting the tent up, then untied his sleeping bag and rolled it on the bare ground under the tent's make-shift cover. As he lay down, he felt his emotions, which he'd been suppressing, suddenly arise.

His love for Robin, his fear for the kid's safety, his hatred for the man he'd never met, who dared to touch his beloved bird. That bastard had Robin scared. The poor kid needed help. He knew, shortly after he left Raven, exactly what the foolish boy had done. All because he had to go and sleep with him. He had run back to the sadistic jack $$ who'd torn him apart piece by bloody piece.

Robin, the boy wonder, savior of Jump City and the beloved idol of many teenage girls and, of course, Red X, had gone into the lair of a monster.

Red cringed at the thought, and a tear escaped his closed lids. He had to be the hero this time. He had to save his… lover.

With that thought, he slept, dreaming of finding the boy, and saving the day.

()~()~()~()~currently()~()~()~()~

Robin had long since finished his meal and lay in his bed, tensing considerably as he felt the bed shift with Slade's weight.

"Robin? Make some room."

The boy shifted slowly and scooted to the far side of his bed, not even looking at the assassin.

Slade smirked and climbed under the blankets by him. "I know I scared you." He gently trailed a hand up and down his arm "I just need you to know, that I would never do to you what I did to them. No matter the price on your head. Trust me, I've turned down three point seven million dollars and instead killed the man who'd intended to hire me to kill you." He gently kissed the boys exposed shoulder "you mean that much to me." He put his free hand on the boy's chest and ran it down his torso, then gripped the front of his boxers. Robin moaned softly, ashamed of himself. Slade chuckled softly and kissed the back of Robin's neck "how would you like to ride me again? No hands unless you say so, promise."

Robin bit his lower lip and nodded, sitting up and faced him as he took his own clothes off, Slade was already naked.

The next morning, Slade woke Robin with kiss all over his neck and chest. Robin smiled and withered, laughing softly "that tickles."

Slade laughed "I'll go make some food, you get in the shower, k?"

Robin opened his eyes and nodded "'K"

Slade walked out, now fully dressed.

Once he was out, Robin hopped in the shower and scrubbed his body until his skin started to peel in some places. He stopped then, only because he was afraid of tearing through the skin and bleeding.

He curled into a ball on the shower floor, clenching his eyes tightly as sobs wrecked through his chest. He curled tighter into himself and pressed his knees to his forehead, and trembled. He felt sick, miserable, disgusted and dead.

There was nothing now, no hope, no joy, nothing but fear and masks even under the black one that covered his face, even now, in the shower. His sobs, though quiet, seemed to echo around the empty bathroom, and echo in his empty heart. He cried until his voice was horse, and his eyes ached.

When he uncurled the shower was now freezing cold and his body throbbed in protest as he stretched out his body. He turned off the shower and went to get a towel.

Suddenly he felt himself falling… falling to the ground, then blackness filled his vision, and it was beautiful. _'in the darkness, I am not the only nothing' _he thought hazily _'I am alone, The blackness is… so beautiful'_ and he passed out on the bathroom floor.

**A/N: **

Sorry if this chapter is not to your liking, it's a bit short, but I hope it is good enough ^.^

Please comment, it gives me inspiration and drive to write more.


	17. And the arrow pierced the bird

_**And the arrow pierced the bird**_

Robin woke up; he didn't know where he was, or what day it was. He had no clue how long he was out, only that he was in a dark room, lying on a metal table, and there were doctor stuff around. He was aware of the needles in his skin and the sound of a heart monitor. He tried to sit up but a familiar, strong hand pushed him back down, "Rest, Robin, you took quite a fall. Mind telling me what the hell happened?" Slade asked, staring him straight in the eyes.

Robin shook his head "I don't know. I just got dizzy. I think I passed out."

Slade sighed "it looks like you're putting too much stress on your body. You aren't sleeping well, or eating well , also, you're overdoing your work outs, I noticed that seventeen Slade bots were out of my storage last Thursday, and twenty the day before. You've been 'passed out' on and off for two weeks, do you remember anything at all?"

Robin shook his head again "nothing, sorry." He closed his eyes "can I go to a real bed, please? This table is too hard."

Slade nodded slowly "as soon as I'm sure you can go on without these machines, then you can move back into my room." He ran a hand through Robin's hair and gently kissed his forehead "I'll go get your lunch, which you _will _eat; its chicken soup, buttered bread, peas and… a can of soda." He smiled "I understand you like Dr. Thunder?"

Robin nodded, smiling softly "why would you allow soda into your home?" Slade laughed softly "well, you need more sugar in your blood, trust me, you'll feel a lot better after a full meal." He walked out then came back with a tray in his hands.

Robin ate his meal, smiling at how quickly the soup warmed him, and about how the sugary soda made him feel wonderful after the first sip.

Suddenly Slade's cell phone rang. He answered "Slade here. Yes… uhuh… I can't right now, I'm tending to someone… Can't you just send it here?!" the conversation was starting to get angry. He suddenly stiffened "when will I be expecting him?" he glanced at Robin, then spoke into the phone again "Sergeant, you are so lucky I don't come to your house and butcher your entire family!" he snarled into the receiver "…I see, no… I promise… Yes, I'll come in next week… how long should I expect to be gone... You don't understand; I cannot leave tonight… FINE! I'll see him when he gets here!" he slammed the phone shut and turned to Robin. "I'm sorry, Robin, you'll be left here for a few weeks… there is an urgent need that must be tended to, I'll leave some money on the counter, you can go into town, just be sure to be back HERE when I return… I'll help you into a 'real' bed as you put it." With that, he supported half of robin's weight as he disconnected him from all of the medical equipment.

Only twenty minutes later, he heard the door open and Slade swore loudly "don't you stick that damn thing in me here, I have… a friend, upstairs."

A man's voice replied "it shouldn't take immediate effect." The voice was calm, and soft, like a doctor's. "And if it does, I will take you away before any damage can be done, but it is quite a long ways away, we want it in full effect by the time we get there."

Slade sighed "no"

There was the sound of movement and a short scuffle before Slade screamed in agony, his cry was cut short and he panted heavily "well, I suppose it DOES take immediate effect, interesting… Brutus, take him to the jet." The others voice said, still calm. There was more movement.

Suddenly light footsteps approached his door "oh, hello there." The soft voice said. Robin shook with fear, and then turned his head to see a skinny, young man in a white lab coat "Don't be afraid of me, I've done nothing wrong. My name is James, I work with the government, I am a biological scientist, and who are you?" the man scanned him with interest as he approached his bedside slowly. Robin closed his eyes and sighed "I'm Robin… What did you do to him?" James smiled again, his full, plump lips drawing back to reveal almost perfectly white teeth, and his impossibly green eyes sparkled "I gave him a small injection of A chemical… do you know about his… past?"

Robin winced as he tried to sit up, James moved quickly to help him "About world war two and all that? Yeah." He admitted softly

"Well," James said, suddenly scanning Robin's body for injury and checking his pulse "We are trying to break down the mutation in his genes, to where he can tolerate blood without his… side effects, or at the very least, increase his awareness… It is a highly painful process." He finished checking on Robin "you should be able to get out of bed later on today, it seems your body just has minor issues." He smiled "sorry to steal him from you, but he should be back within a month. Until then, don't do ANYTHING that he wouldn't approve of… he is quite touchy after treatments." James warned before leaving "have a nice day." With that, he shut the door.

Robin closed his eyes and thought. How weird. Slade didn't answer to anyone, but he was putting up with something that he clearly didn't want.

Maybe there was still more that he didn't know about the assassin.

The next morning, Robin dressed in some regular people clothes that he'd found in one of the dresser drawers and, for the first time in weeks, took off his mask. He took the money off of the counter and walked out.

^*^*^*^currently^*^*^*^

Red X walked around the areas he had yet to examine, still finding nothing. He was running out of food and water. He would have to return soon to restock if nothing else.

That thought killed him, leaving his mission… leaving Robin. He couldn't just leave him to the 'other man's' devices. It would be like… heh, like sleeping with someone, then leaving the next day.

Red X chuckled humorlessly, irony was almost funny. He sat on the ground, glaring at a tree. It got very boring very fast, so he lay fully on the soft green grass and glared up at the sky… that was kind of better.

He was now far outside of jump and it would be another half weeks way back on foot, maybe less. About 30 minutes in a car or something. Most of the way was up hill though. He decided to keep going, the next town was only an hour or two's walk away…

Suddenly he heard a familiar motor. He sat up and looked around; then he saw it, a flash of red. Robin's bike!

He ran toward it, screaming and waving his arms like a mad man "HEYY! ROBIN! OVER HERE! ROBIN!" the motorcyclist stopped in his tracks and turned, pulling the visor on his helmet down to shield his face "Red X?" he climbed off of his bike and slowly walked to him "what are you doing here?"

Red smiled under his mask and pulled robin into his arms, "I was looking for you, I came to help you." He nuzzled the other boy's helmet "I'm so glad you're safe… Take off the helmet." Robin sighed and did so, he closed his eyes tightly so that his eyes still couldn't be seen by the thief. Red smiled and took his own mask off before kissing Robin square on the lips. Robin pulled away, his shocking blue eyes opening in shock and he covered his mouth "you are so lucky he isn't here right now… he would have killed you for that!"

Red X blinked, taking a step back "what are you talking about kid? If he isn't here, then you can go back to Titan Tower, right?"

Robin snorted "No, he said I had to be at the hide out when he gets back." Red X shook his head "Robin, I'm here now, let me save you."

Robin looked his square in the eyes "I. Cant. "he sighed "Thanks, but no. I have to handle things on my own, and HE is mine to handle." He turned to walk away, but Red X grabbed his arm "Robin, I will NOT let you stay here! He will hurt you again!"

Robin turned and shocked them both by punching Red X square in the jaw, causing the older teen to stumble back

"Go away, Red X. I love him." Robin's powder blue eyes hardened as he glared at the other boy.

**A/N:**

~GASP!~ I know, right? I'm not so sure about this chapter, I may delete it soon. But trust me, Red is still a good man and Slade is still a bastard.

He's just a sick, sad man, isn't he? ^.^

Well, please review, I would love your input! And please tell me if I should delete this chapter. Please and thank you


	18. To fly through the storm

_**To fly through the storm**_

Just like that, the words slipped out of his mouth. He had no idea where it came from. But he _needed_ the man; he always had. Everything he fought for, the man fought against, the reason he even had his fire, his drive to _live_ was for the man. He hated it, it hurt him deeply, and he wanted to die right then and there as red's shock turned into a pained look as he took off his mask.

"You're kidding, right, birdie? You can't love the man that raped you! The man that hurt you! HOW COULD YOU POSSIABLY CARE FOR HIM?!" his demeanor turned into that of a wounded animal, hurt and defensive. "Please, remember what he did to you, can you honestly say you love him more than Batman? More than your best friends? More than…me?"

Robin swallowed a lump forming in his throat. And tears burned in his eyes "…yes, Red X… I can't live without him. I need him, I breath him… and he loves me!"

Red shook his head violently "NO! I will NOT allow you to be with him!" he pinned the smaller hero to a tree and kissed him deeply.

Tears sprang into Robin's eyes, but he didn't fight him off, something in his brain was trying to get attention, a faint voice that he shut out.

Red pulled off "I love you, kid, and even if you don't love me; know I will never let him have you! He is filth, he is nothing! After what he did to you, he is nothing but the scum on a dung beetle's feet!"

Robin snarled and punched him again "Don't say that! You don't even know him!"

Red shook his head "no… I don't" he said, cradling his now injured cheek in his hand "And I'm glad I never will… because I'm a thief, I wouldn't want him to make me a murderer too." He turned and walked off "I'll save you kid; even if it takes all my life, I won't let you suffer." And he ran off

Robin shook, the moment he was out of sight then put a hand to his face. Tremors shook his entire frame as sobs broke through his mouth. Red X… he couldn't believe he'd hit him… Twice! He needed Slade, he wanted Red, he wanted Batman… he wanted to die.

Rain started to fall and thunder boomed in the sky, followed by a bright blue flash. This was the storm Slade told him was coming, it matched him, and it rinsed his tears.

If he'd ever needed someone, now was the time. And he'd pushed someone important away. He ran a hand through his hair and looked upward, closing his eyes and allowing his body to push forward; just like he always had. He pushed himself every day, he always had. Every morning at the tower he would work out, then come down and force himself to smile, force himself to laugh. It was truly the hardest job possible, anything that he couldn't hit, any bad guy he couldn't lock up.

What if he was the worst bad guy of them all? What if all of his lies had turned him into something worse than any common villain?

What if Slade had been right all those times? What if he always was, and always would be, just like Slade himself?

He shook and pulled himself onto his bike and rode back to the hideout. He'd had enough of the outside world for now. He just wanted Slade's nice warm bed, maybe a shower. And some of the left over lasagna didn't sound too bad.

He smiled as he turned into the bush and his bike again before running back into Slade's hide out and turning the shower water on.

He stripped off his sopping wet clothes and climbed in, letting the hot steam puff around his face as he relaxed into the spray. He sighed and closed his eyes, thinking about Red X. He hadn't meant to hit to hit him or anything. He just felt so protective over Slade. But Love? Had he really said love? Was that it? He was so sure at the time, but now… Red had said that he _couldn't_ love the man, like he had any choice at all. Robin scoffed and turned off the water, opting to towel off and go back to bed.

For the next three months his routine was, as fallows. Wake up, burn breakfast, train, burn lunch; go for a walk, train, burn dinner, shower, and sleep.

He had been sleeping when a warm, large hand pushed his hair out of his face "good evening, Robin."

Robin opened his eyes sleepily, then smiled and flung himself into the villain's arms "Slade! You're back!"

Slade chuckled and kissed the teen deeply; creasing his face "I'll let the sudden show of affection go as exhaustion." He said after breaking the kiss and just held his teen close before falling asleep.

*^*^*^*^currently*^*^*^*^

Red X had hitched a ride to Gotham City and was now doing all he could to make Batman come for him. He broke into a jewelry store, breaking all the windows, and even set the fire alarm before jumping on the roof. Soon enough, before the sirens even arrived, he felt the Dark Knight land gracefully behind him.

Batman grabbed the teen's wrists "hey… I've heard of you…" Batman concentrated on his mask "you're the kid who keeps stealing from Roger's Riches in Jump City!"

Red pulled his arms away and turned to face him "I am. I'm also the kid who's trying to save your side kick. Robin is in a lot of trouble. And he doesn't even know it. He has no idea what has happened to him." Red's eyes grew troubled.

**A/N**

**Good? Bad? Sad? How is my story? Please comment, I love to hear from those who read my story. **

**Ty! **

**~Fejuima N Kuzo**


	19. A robin's redbreast in a cage

_**A Robin Redbreast in a cage  
Puts all Heaven in a Rage.  
**_

Batman's eyes narrowed "You know Robin? Do you work for Slade?" the man growled out

"Slade? HE'S BEHINDTHIS?!" the boy cried out and shook his head "oh god!" the boy drooped his head in his hands "this is worse than I thought."

Bruce grabbed his arm "Gordon's arriving… normally I wouldn't aid a criminal, but it looks like you have some information I need." He dragged the boy away.

When they got to the Bat cave, Batman finally let go of him "alright, what's wrong with Robin?"

Red X sighed "if I tell you, you won't believe me. I hardly believe myself…" he laughed darkly "but there are harder things to believe, I suppose." Batman raised his eye brow, impatiently; this made Red X smile and shake his head, the frown, all of his expressions hidden under the mask "Alright, first of all, you seem to know about the man who raped him, right?" Batman nodded, and red leant against the wall "yeah, well, Slade is a really bad guy. Me? I'm like a big box of fluffy kittens compared to him." Red X looked at the ceiling "well, Robin and me… we had an agreement, but I'm horrible at keeping my word." He felt the man's anger start to show itself "Yeah," Red confirmed his suspicions "all he asked for was one night, and in turn, I have that night to remember the rest of my life. Thing is, most of the time we were together, he kept thinking of _him._

He actually cried. Do you know what that's like? Bat?" he tilted his head "feeling the boy you love tremble and sob, when there's nothing you can do?"

Batman looked away "yes, actually. I do." He sighed "where is he now?"

Red's eyes narrowed and he spat out the words "He went back to Slade… willingly."

Batman turned, shaking his head "no, that can't be." He strode to Red X and lifted him by the front of his shirt "tell me you're lying!"

The boy shook his head calmly "I'm telling the truth. I spent days looking for him; when I found him, he told me that he loved him, that he wanted to be with him." Red X landed easily on his feet the moment Batman dropped him "I held him that night, and I kissed away his tears. God, I almost felt his pain."

Batman nodded "Raven, the empath, said that his emotions almost got them all killed." he said, looking at the thief

"Exactly!" Red exclaimed "now, THINK about it. He was kidnapped, terrified, hurt, raped, and then, when released from his captor, he ran right back, willing, needing him. What do you think it is?"

Batman's eyes widened "Oh god!"

_______________

**A/N: **sorry it's so short! but i had to cliff hang this one ^.^

poor Robin, poor Red. what nexT? oh, idk, it will take at least three reviews to find out! ^.^


	20. Bind the bird bring the peace

Bind the bird; bring the peace

Batman's eyes widened "Oh god, Stockholm syndrome." He clenched his  
fists, Red X merely nodded in response.

Red took a soft breath and looked directly at the man "yes. I believe so. We  
can go to jump city when you're ready, I know you have friends who will  
watch your city for you." He tilted his head "You can go to the tower, the  
Titans will welcome you. I have some things to do before we make any move.  
Seeing as you are the world's greatest detective, you can probably manage  
finding out where the bastard is keeping him. We'll meet up in four days at  
the tower's usual pizza palace table, invite them to lunch, I don't care,  
Raven already knows about me." The thief said, already having figured it all  
out.

Batman sighed, running a hand over his cowl "you know… Robin's always  
been such a pain." He smirked "some things never change. I'll go call  
Aqua man; he can watch Gothem for at least three months. He and I are  
good friends."

He looked at the teen "how are you planning on getting back to jump?" Red  
looked at him, smirking "I'll be hitch hiking, the same way I go there."  
Batman sighed "why don't you stay here for the night? I can take you in the  
bat mobile in the morning." Red X laughed hard "no thanks, I'll take my  
chances on the road. No offence, I just have some things I have to take of  
before all of this starts… and I think the name you gave your car is more  
special then if you were to drive a short bus."

The Thief took off, laughing at the gape of disbelief on Batman's face.

*^*^*^*currently*^*^*^*

Robin woke up and stretched across the bed, empty except for him. He sat up  
and looked around. That was odd; Slade hadn't asked him for…anything. That  
thought made him blush as he dressed quickly and walked into the kitchen area,  
as he descended the stares, he let his mind wonder to James, he had said to not  
upset Slade… So, did that mean he had to please him? then he would. He would  
make Slade happy. The assassin was setting the table, omelets, with veggies,  
what looked like fancy bread and two tall glasses of orange juice.

Slade smiled, mask less "morning, my little bird. Try some breakfast."  
Robin smiled and sat at the table "it looks great, Slade." He took a  
bite of the omelet and smiled, not knowing how hungry he'd been until just  
then. He ate happily, then noticed Slade's irritated glare. He set his fork  
down "d...did I do something wrong?"Slade shook his head "just eat a  
little slower; I'm ** a bird, not a pig."Robin looked down "sorry."  
That had really hurt. He hadn't felt so…low… since Batman had rejected  
him. It made him almost numb, but horribly depressed at the same time. That  
thought ** him off, which made him feel worse.

Slade sighed and put a hand on his shoulder "I'm… Glad you're  
enjoying your breakfast, just… ignore what I said. My, ah, treatments are  
rather painful; they mess with my entire body… makes me angry, and  
irritable." He kissed the top of Robin's head, smiling as he felt the boy  
relax "would you like a soda instead of orange juice? I noted how much you  
liked that before I left." Robin nodded eagerly, smiling "yes, please."

He smiled happily as Slade walked toward the fridge, then came back with a Dr.  
Pepper before extending the drink to him. Robin took it from him, smiling as he  
continued to eat. After he was done he looked at Slade, who'd eaten his  
breakfast as well "Do you want me to do the dishes?" Robin asked, standing  
up. Slade shook his head and took the plates "No, it's ok. You just go  
exercise or something… I'll do the dishes and see you for lunch at twelve  
thirty on the dot, alright?" Robin kissed the older man on the cheek before  
taking off. He started his workout slow; because he knew Slade didn't want  
him to overdo it again. He hardly noticed the time passing at all.*()*()*()  
Currently*()*()*()Raven answered the door, her eyes widened "Batman!" her  
voice was just barley revealing the surprise, only fractioned compared to  
everyone else's.

Batman nodded as he entered the room "Raven, I found out ware Robin is;  
or more the point, who he's with.""Titan meeting" Raven said calmly,  
then went to the kitchen and started making the tea as everyone scrambled,  
taking more than ten minutes to sit down and calm down. Raven handed Batman a  
cup, then sat down with her own "alright batman, please, enlighten us."  
Batman took a breath "A young man, one that you seem to have known  
about, Raven." He eyed her levelly "came to me with some rather…  
disturbing information." He explained all he could to the teenagers without  
once mentioning Red X, or any of the more private conversation they had shared.

*^*^*^*Back with the little bird, hours later*^*^*^*

Robin walked up, weak with exhaustion. He say a clock in the hall and  
gasped, then ran in to the kitchen, it was 1:00 pm, he was half an hour late.  
Slade was at the table, his mask on. An uneaten plate of salad and beef  
strips sat on his side of the table, staring accusingly up at him "Sorry  
Slade, I guess I lost track of time" He sat down, smiling embarrassed.

Slade stood, taking the plate away "isn't that just great?" He threw the  
meal away, plate and all "If you were on time, you would have eaten, now, you  
go and do something else."Robin blinked "but… I'm hun-" Slade  
slammed his fist on the table "I said go, Robin. Do. Not. Test. Me!" He  
snarled. Robin jumped from his seat, his instincts taking in "no, I was  
training, like you said. Maybe if you put a god damned clock in the stupid  
room, then I could have been here on time. I'm hungry, and I want food!"

Slade grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him to his face  
"you're pissing me off." Robin snarled "I don't care!"Slade threw  
him to the ground. Robin fell with a pained grunt and crouched, ready to defend himself. Slade charged at him. 

**A/N** Oh, dear me! ANOTHER cliffy?! What has gotten to me? Normally I'm not  
so mean! Truly, I'm not… oh well. I'll have another chapter later today  
if I get enough love in review form! ^.^

Btw, Amanda040 was right! Stockholm 

It is defined in Wikipedia as fallows:

In psychology, **Stockholm syndrome** is a term used to describe a paradoxical psychological phenomenon wherein hostages express adulation and have positive feelings towards their captors that appear irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims.[1][2] While uncommon, the FBI's Hostage Barricade Database System shows that roughly 27% of victims show evidence of Stockholm syndrome.[3] The syndrome is named after the Norrmalmstorg robbery of Kreditbanken at Norrmalmstorg in Stockholm, in which the bank robbers held bank employees hostage from August 23 to August 28, 1973. In this case, the victims became emotionally attached to their captors, and even defended them after they were freed from their six-day ordeal. The term "Stockholm Syndrome" was coined by the criminologist and psychiatrist Nils Bejerot, who assisted the police during the robbery, and referred to the syndrome in a news broadcast.[4] It was originally defined by psychiatrist Frank Ochberg to aid the management of hostage situations.[5]

In layman terms, that means some people fall in love with their captors. It's a mental condition, they think every kindness the 'bad guy' shows is so good, that they can look past the abuse kidnapping and such.


	21. There are no birds in last year's nest

_**There are no birds in last year's nest**_

Robin dodged Slade's firs charge; but got flung into a wall after Slade turned in mid-movement and rammed into him from behind.

Robin turned and flung himself from the wall straight into Slade's chest. The man fell back with a grunt, then lifted his leg and kicked the teen away. Robin landed on his feet and charged again, But Slade was faster, for he side stepped him and grabbed Robin's arm from behind, he pulled the insolent boy to him and, gripping the boy's wrist, he twisted it behind his back, smirking in satisfaction at the sickening crack. Robin cried out in pain.

He dropped the boy, only to have him turn and kick Slade's exposed leg, making him kneel to catch his balance, bringing him down closer to Robin's position on the ground. And the teen slammed his metal-clad boot into Slade's mask, the man fell back, groaning before he flipped and landed on top of the teen, being sure not to crush him completely, just putting enough weight on him to show who was boss.

"I said don't test me, Robin." He whispered into his hair, and caressed his face. The teen took in a sharp breath "go take a shower, in about three hours you can have an early dinner, if you get hungry later on, then we can have some dessert." He kissed the boy's temple. "I did warn you, love, that my treatments give me a temper. Do not disobey me again." He grabbed his arm and shoved it back into its socket, causing the boy to cry out and groan in pain. Slade pushed himself off of the hero and he stalked away.

Robin closed his eyes and ran up to the shower, trying to not let his tears show. He was angry; he knew he'd been reckless, trying to challenge the man when he himself had been exhausted from training too hard and being too hungry. It was one meal, not like he could die from it or anything, so why had he gotten so upset over it? What had caused him to make Slade so mad at him? He closed his eyes and let out a sigh of regret, anger, and, most dominant, self-loathing.

Now, Robin was not the kind of boy to cry, but he was defiantly breaking records. As he felt the hot tears sting at the back of his eyes, didn't even try to hold it back. Not one good cry did him any good; this helped him, in a way. He now knew that he had changed, and yesteryear was gone for good, just as Richard Grayson, was gone for good, just as his parents were gone for good. He had let Bruce down, he had let his mom down, and he was sure his father would be rolling in his grave, too, had he any idea what was happening… What little Dick Grayson had become; he had turned into a wanton, needy, attention seeking little boy. He deserved this; he deserved the nightmares that plagued him in his sleep, he deserved every remark, every snarl, and every wound he received for his own foolishness.

Yet, selfishly, he desired something more. He wanted love.

Slade lent against the wall, just outside of the bathroom door, listening to Robin's sobs. He closed his eyes against the sound, leaning his forehead against the wood. God, he just kept messing up. But that was what he was recreated for; destruction. Every scientist in that lab had turned him into a ticking time bomb; with any small thing that set him off, he would attack it, everything that caused him pain, he would try to remove. And he kept destroying any chances he had with making his young lover happy.

*^*^*^currently*^*^*^

Red X walked to a grave yard, just outside of a darkened, lonely church, a church who's god and people had abandoned it years ago; not even the mice stayed in the decaying building with paint, once white, now green and brown from years of dirt and decay.

He stood in front of an almost fresh grave… well; fresher than the others surrounding it. No moss yet covered the length of it; no vines had climbed up its marble cross, still white. Its false angel, frozen forever staring from the top of said cross, crying granite tears upon the silent grave.

Red sighed, closing his eyes as he put a hand over his chest, and clenched his eyes tight, forcing back the memories. He knew his soul had a place to go, if he ended up dying in the mission to save Robin. But ware would his soul go if it made him a killer? No heaven would accept him, and he would never see Robin again; Stockholm syndrome was a powerful thing, like a demented, sick form of love; Robin was in a morbid connection with the man, and, if he killed him, Robin would hate him forever.

He sighed and took one last look at the grave, and stared at the words engraved in the cold stone;

'_Rest in peace, Leo Roger Marin, Beloved son, kind friend and wonderful person; May god forever hold you in his arms, as we hold you in our hearts.'_

Red scoffed and stalked away. He was ready to save Robin, good thing he had a big black bat on his side.

__________

_**A/N:**_

Well? Is the mystery good? I worked very hard on this chapter. Sorry it took so long to put up! I had only two Reviews, that makes me sad, and slow; as it is, I like to know people actually read it! ^.^ Thank you for your patience


	22. Had the phesant not screamed

_**Had the pheasant not screamed, it would not have been shot**_

Four days had gone by in the blink of an eye, and Batman, followed by the titans, arrived at the Pizza Palace. And there sat Red X, his mask half way up as he sipped at a Coca Cola; his legs were crossed so casually, as he peered in their direction "hello."

Cyborg readied his blaster as BB took the form of a large Siberian tiger.

Batman put a hand on Cyborg's arm, pushing it gently down "don't. He's here to help"

Red X hadn't even flinched as he fixed his mask and stretched "let's get down to business, alright, kiddos?" He smirked at the mixed reactions, a smirk from Batman and snarls and angry remarks from the boys and Starfire. Red only smirked behind his mask as they all complied.

"I'm here to help our little bird. He went back to Slade, obviously Batman here, filled you all in. It seems, though, that we are at a standstill as far as finding out ware, exactly the hide out is. Now, we can only hold things off so long; We can do it the hero way, waste time, and hope that Robin's condition doesn't get worse, or, we could do it my way… We have to think cruel, break my little birdies heart a bit, in order to save him."

Starfire stood "I will not hurt friend Robin!" Bb glared, standing as well "right! We won't let you hurt your… your robin?"

Red ignored the green one's comment… for now "I never said anything about physically hurting him, we just have to get him out of hiding, in order to do that, we have to kill one of you off, my choice is Raven." Cyborg's fist came too fast to dodge, and Red felt the impact of his smashing the metal of his mask slammed into his face, and his head snapped back.

Red closed his eyes against the pain and straightened up, not caring that blood now dripped out from under his mask "calm down there, metal man. I didn't mean literally!" he snapped at the older teen who was being held back only by Raven's hand on his arm "lets listen to him."

Red sighed and put his hand under his mask, everyone heard the snapping as he set his nose back into place "he just needs to think you're dead. He will come for the funeral, and we can… persuade him to come back, alright?" he looked around at the titans, all looking pale, sad… and exhausted. He wasn't the only one suffering after all. He stared at Raven's in particular, focusing on her eyes, torn, determined, depressed; yet oh so strong. "As his best friend, you would be the one he would come out after." He looked at all the titans again, and batman "You all know the danger he is in. Do you honestly think there's any other way? He's been gone for weeks; let's hear your amazing ideas to save your best friend, if you suddenly thought of a good one."

No one said a word.

^()^()^()currently^()^()^()

Robin lay on the ground, staring at the ceiling. He had been avoiding Slade for the last few days altogether, he just hadn't known what to do. He was making the man mad at every turn. He wanted to be by the older man at every second. It almost hurt, having to be away from him so long. This wasn't like him, he knew it, but… still, it was how it was.

Suddenly, an arm wrapped around him, Slade smiled, his eye examining him "hey baby, how are you feeling?" Robin turned to face him "I'm alright, how are you?" Slade chuckled and pulled him to his chest "I am well, love." He kissed the top of his head. Robin nuzzled into him and kissed his chest, Slade's head radiated to Robin, making him beyond happy. Slade kissed him deeply, slowly climbing on top of Robin, who tangled his hands in his hair. Slade ran a hand up his side and slowly climbed on top of him, earning a little gasp from Robin, then a wanton moan.

Slade kissed the boy's neck, and then nipped at it, tasting the sweet flesh on his pallet. He kissed greedily down the boy's body, caressing every inch of the teen with his fingers and tong. Robin made the most exquisite sounds when he kissed a particularly sensitive area, like the space connecting his leg to the hip, his thighs, and just below his belly button.

Robin hissed in a breath when his lover took him into his mouth. It was amazing, truly. He hissed and arched. Red had been wrong, Slade would never hurt him again, not like he had before, because, now, Robin was all too willing to please the man, he proved this point when he opened his mouth and whispered "please, now, I'm ready."

And Slade obliged.

He lifted the teen's legs and draped them over his shoulders, looking into his eyes "are you sure?" Robin nodded, one short tilt of the head; it was all the encouragement Slade needed as he thrust deeply into the teen, moaning out as loud as his vocal cords allowed.

Robin cried out, god… it felt good. He draped his legs on the man's shoulder, already getting hard "please, Slade, its good." He could not have been more incoherent, Slade knew what he wanted anyway, as he began thrusting in a slow rhythmic pace. Slade quickened as the little noises sounded like great encouragement. "Robin, I'm about to-" Robin nodded, moaning louder "me too!"  
They came together, mashing their lips together, Robin clang to Slade for dear life as the man wrapped his warm arms firmly around the boy. After they calmed enough, they lay in a heap of moist flesh, Slade grabbed a blanket off of the bed with his free arm… they hadn't quite made it there. Heh. He draped it around them as they both drifted off to sleep.

**A/N:** um. Hi. How is it? please review, I have gotten so few lately on this story, and it is my favorite to write. Oh, and Ann, I did read that story, but my friend and I had already thought of Stockholm syndrome being a good thing in a story. Yet, seeing it in Sladinforever's story made me happy, and I figured that it wouldn't hurt to add such an idea to ours. (btw, Sladinforever's stories are very good! Read them.) Loving all of my fans! ^.^

~Fejumia Kuzo


	23. when a robin cries in the night

_**The air is sour, when a Robin cries in the night**_

Three months had gone by. Red had said that putting it off was indeed dangerous, and stupid. But doing it immediately could raise unwanted suspicion from Slade. That would not go well; Slade was not an easy man to please either, to their plan had to go without a hitch.

Raven got ready to die in front of all of Jump city. The plan was perfect. She stood on top of one of Bruce's towers, located right in the middle of the city; no one could miss the view, especially with the crowd that would soon surround the building. She took a deep breath and got ready. Suddenly, she knew… she was not alone.

()^()^()^currently()^()^()^

Robin was eating his fill of omelets. Slade had taught him to love Saturday brunches; it made more time to train, two meals instead of three.

Slade smiled at him from the other side of the table. "Let's go out today, hmmm? I understand that you may need some regular clothes. I have one outfit for you, you could ware that out."

Robin smirked "I'm not falling for it, just because you can get into my tights doesn't mean you can see under my mask." Slade laughed "And why not? Be normal for a day, it will be good for you."

Robin chewed his omelet thoughtfully "I'm not so sure about that…" he blushed as Slade crossed the table and put a hand on his lower belly "take off the mask, Mr. Grayson. " Robin's eyes widened, then narrowed "what the hell?!" he stood up; Slade smirked and lent against a wall "Do you really think I would expose my identity to you without knowing who you were first? Robin, you are mine, I studied you as you studied me. Only… you were a lot easier to find out about. After all, I work for governments, remember? I had them burn my records long ago. I therefore exist in no government computer, you exist every ware."

Robin looked down and put his hand to his face, tracing the outline of his mask with the tip of his pointer finger "I… I'm not Dick Grayson anymore… I let him die in Gotham years ago…" a tear slid past his mask "because Dick is dead, Richard-" 

Slade cut him off "No, my love, Everyone in Gotham thinks that Bruce sent you to a Pre collage school, where you are excelling in everything." He wrapped his arms around Robin, gently caressing his sides "you aren't dead to anyone, beloved." Slade kissed Robin gently, and pulled back, smiling. _But I'm dead to me._ Robin thought, putting a hand over his chest. He sighed and slowly peeled the mask off of his face.

"Robin… you are perfect." Slade purred, making the teen blush and look away. Slade picked him up and roughly pin him against the wall, his kiss demanding. Robin moaned, tangling his hands in his hair "mmm, Slade" he moaned as Slade kissed down his neck. The assassin responded by nipping his neck and ripping his uniform off, piece by piece. Robin moaned at his touch, then stilled, a blush spreading across his face "um… Slade?" he shoved at him

"Mmm!" Slade growled in protest. Then he heard someone clear their throat. He stiffened and turned to see who it was.

James stood there, one hand in his clean lab coat, his other one ran through his pail blond hair "sorry there, Slade. But It was quite urgent. He sent me the very moment we got the results from your latest tests." Slade set a naked Robin down and sighed. "and?" he asked, sarcastic boredom in his tone.

James tilted his head "Brutus, please step outside." A tall, dark man with many scars marring his face walked out of a shadowed area. His almond colored eyes stared at James disapprovingly before he walked out "do you want him to take your little friend with him?"

Slade looked at Robin then shook his head "there is nothing that could scare or surprise him now." He put a hand on the kid's head. James laughed and took his lab coat off, revealing tight black jeans and a green turtle neck that matched his eyes. He draped it around Robin, who smiled thankfully and buttoned it up "I thought it would be better if he weren't naked…" Robin blushed and Slade snarled, wrapping an arm around his young lover.

James sighed and paced "Working with you is always a pleasure, Slade. After continuing my father's work, I found a way to cure your effects… we thought. This time was no less disappointing then the previous sessions. It seems that I've failed you. As my father failed you; please forgive me." He closed his eyes, all humor leaving him.

Slade sighed and nodded "I knew this would be the same. " James nodded "however, we think that another treatment may work. Slade, your DNA reacted to my last possibility…. It would seem as if it weakened the mutated gene. Of course, the gene recovered at a rapid rate. But, we believe that if we were to just tweak the formula…?"

Slade groaned and wrapped his arms around Robin "when does he want me back?" James smirked, god, he was so much like a cat! Robin couldn't compare his bipolar superiority complex to anything else! "He wants you back immediately to undergo more studies, and inject a concentrated form of my original formula!"

Slade looked at Robin "will it help me control my anger?" The question was obviously intended for James, who nodded "Yes… maybe. If not, then it should at least decrease it."

Brutus ran in "James, there's something going on; doesn't look good." James turned to look at him "what is it?" Brutus looked back out the door "some little girl's getting attacked. She's one hella a fighter though."

Robin tightened his grip on the lab coat "is she a girl with black hair? Dressed in blue and black?" Brutus nodded and Robin grabbed his mask.

Slade grabbed his wrist "Where do you think you're going, Love?" Robin snarled and yanked his arm away "It's Raven! I need to go help her!" Slade growled and snatched Robin' forearm in a vice grip "I don't think so."

Robin yanked his arm away again "Slade, we are equal, you can leave so can i. My friend needs me. No one will stop me, not even you!" Brutus opened the door and Robin streaked out of the hide out, he snapped his mask into place and rode to jump city.

*^*^*^currently^*^*^*^

Raven dodged a blow "who _are_ you?" She was starting to panic. Not good; not at all. The taller, obviously male figure threw another punch at her. She jumped then hissed and grabbed her arm. He had an accomplice. The man had sliced her arm with a sharp knife. This was not what they'd planned, Red was supposed to be fighting her, but he was standing in the corner, gaping in horror. "RAVEN! LOOK OUT!" he cried. She levitated the knife as the man lunged at her again, the other one put a different knife to her throat, and she gasped.

Red ran forward and kicked the blade from the man's grip; his perfect aim hit the knife an angle that wouldn't hurt raven in the slightest. He punched the man hard in the face and helped raven up. They fought the two highly skilled men. Suddenly, red stopped in mid battle. The sound of a motorcycle filled the air. Robin's red bike blurred with a flash of white on top. It screeched to a halt. There stood Robin. His mask was crooked, his hair lay against his face and neck, a bit longer then last the titans had seen him.

"red." It was barley a sigh, his smile soft. Then he gasped "RED!" It was too late. Red hissed and reached to his side ware a knife stuck out. The man was already leaping away, laughing as he and his partner took off. Red dropped to his knees; his hands that touched his wound dripped with his blood. Raven put her hands on red's chest "his heart beat's still strong, let's get him to the hospital."

Red laughed, making more blood gush out "so… he's found me." Red went limp, dropping mask first into the crimson pool.

_**A/N:**_0.0

Oh. My. God.

I am a bad person! Just look what I did! PLEASE! Loyal fans, do not leave me, all will come in time, Red's story will be explained it all, promise! And yes, i love you all. Your comments mean so much to me, so I just know you are going to post one, right? A nice little review for me? Sorry if this sucks, I am sleepy today. I will tare it down as soon as someone says I should. Cuz' idk how it looks to other ppl .

Loves my fans! Loves robin and red!

But now all of my readers, I go to bed! Ha, I'm a poet! XD


	24. light as a lead feather

_**Light as a lead feather**_

_A seven year old Red X stood in the middle of his living room, holding a picture, staring at it. A woman smiled through the frame, a man, so young and happy, grinned at his red haired wife. A happy couple, the women's stomach was swollen with life, not yet born. A smile touched the boy's lips; oh, his mother was lovely, and his father was so different from what he was now; large, unhappy, and cruel. _

_As if to emphasize the fact of his thought, his stomach growled. He was hungry, as he had been for three days. His dad had taken off, leaving nothing but mustard in the kitchen, and for those three days, he had only that mustard and bits of old bread to eat. He was sick of it!_

_He walked outside, setting the picture down as he went. He walked to the market, just three blocks out of 'poor town' (the cheap, run down old buildings that the richer people of the neighborhood had so callously called it) He smelled the sweet breads and fresh pies for sale, oh, how his mouth watered at the scents. Another growl erupted from his empty bell. He spotted an unguarded hot dog stand. Now, Janet Melissa O'garri- Marin would abhor the idea of anyone she knew stealing like a common fool; one who knew not how to fend for themselves. But, oh, how his stomach growled. He reached up at the stand and snatched a hotdog, and then he ran._

_He smiled, feeling his body becoming doused in adrenalin; his senses heightened and his pleasure grew onto an almost dream like state. And oh! How his prize burned deliciously on his tongue; the still hot juices scalding his tongue in the most pleasant manner. The grease felt like a million of the greatest pleasantries the world had to offer as it dripped down his chin. He finished it off, greedily, and then licked off every bit of the lingering goodness that clang to each finger._

_Oh, mother would turn in her grave. But the hunger was almost gone! Oh, his gut gurgled happily as he patted it. He ran back home, grinning the whole way. But when he got there, his smile fell. His father was waiting for him, a knowing look spread across his face, and accusation shone in his blood shot eyes. He gulped. His happiness drained away._

"Red! Please, wake up red!" Raven whispered above his bed. She smiled as he cracked his eyes opened "robin. Looks like your boy's up…" she touched the sleeping boy's shoulder. The boy shifted, then his head moved to Red "oh, good." The other teen stood and hovered over the bed "you are an idiot, red X. I should seriously leave right now. It's been two days, Slade's gonna be furious when I get back!"

Red laughed "I'm fine, thanks for wondering." He grabbed the back of Robins head and yanked him down for a kiss. The boy, who was obviously emotionally drained, kissed red right back. Red sighed, after the kiss broke, he smiled, even as he saw the tears build up in his own eyes, he was happy.

"Stay with me, please, Robin?" he ran a hand down the hero's face. Robin shook his head "I can't. Slade's waiting for me, he worries, you know?" Red growled and sat up, hissing in the pain that filled his entire body, starting and ending at his now bleeding side. He ignored Raven's attempts to make him lay back down "Slade is an ass hole. I hate him. He's only using ya kid! Why can't you see it?" he put his hand on his cheek. The teen snarled and pulled away "I love him! I need him! And he's a great man; he's been through so much. He needs me, and I need him. Red, what happened between you and me, it was a mistake."

Red closed his eyes, trying to block out the pain. "It was not. I love you!" all the titans stayed quiet. And batman's hand clenched into a fist. "Don't do this! He is a monster, Robin. He's just gonna use you, beat you, take what he wants then leave you… Maybe even kill you!"

Robin put a hand over his face, turning away "Shut up, Red." Red didn't listen "has he hit you recently? Claimed you? When is the last time he made you cry?" Robin turned, getting in Red X's face, "shut the hell up. You don't know him! YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT HIM! He's just misguided; he doesn't know how to treat someone he loves, but he _does_ love me." Robin got quieter "and I know it's true, so you don't need any evidence, you are nothing to me. One night, remember? That's all it was, all it is and that's it! I don't love you, I can't stand you. You think you know me?" he let out a cold, humorless laugh "no one knows me, no one but him." He looked at Batman "and you, old man." He strode over to him, calmly, and lifted his chin "I have no idea how you tie into all of this, but go home." He looked down "I'm sorry these people made you worry, but I'm fine. I'm happy."

Batman's eyes narrowed "_these people _are your best friends, Robin. And I am your father. I raised you ever since your parents were taken away from men like him. He kills, sure I don't know him, but I do know his kind. I've seen his work. He is no better than your parent's murerders!"

Robin gasped

"He took away men, women, and children; for money. You don't think he's ever orphaned anyone? What a selfish wish. Trust me, he is no different. All he wants is more property. You once compared him to the Joker; let me let you in on a little secret, ok? Slade is nothing like Joker, because Joker is indeed a mad man, but during our battles, he has never once hurt a child. Your lover, Slade, is killing one on the inside every day. I'm sure you met the kid in question; he has baby blue eyes, black hair, a broken heart and great friends. We are here for you, but if you really want to walk away from Richard Grayson, and everything he ever knew, his mom, his dad, and his adoptive father, the," he side stepped "there's the door."

_**A/N**_

How was that? Again, my loyal fans; should I tear it down? oh, I know, cliffy. BUT! If I get only ONE review, then I will post another this very night! ^.^ promise on all the cake and caffeine in the world!


	25. A Robin's wing can mend in time

_**A robin's broken wing can mend in time**_

Robin walked to the door, then stopped with his hand on the handle "There's something wrong with me, isn't there?" Raven looked down "we think so, yes."

Robin turned around, a tear trailing down his face "but… I'm happy." Batman shook his head and Cyborg put a hand on raven's shoulder, speaking calmly "no, you aren't. I don't have a clue what happened between you and Red X over there, but I do know that he saw something we couldn't, and he did something we couldn't. He made you happy, for real, man. Slade hurt you so bad that you actually think he helped you." Starfire chimed in "On our planet, that is called a waxorge, meaning dark heart, or painful love. My people can die from it."

Bb nodded "the closest I ever got to love was Terra, and she really was just misled; by Slade… and he was the reason she died." The green boy's ears went back. Raven looked at him "real love is what we have for each other, maybe not the same kind of love you think you've found, but a true love that hopefully can help you get over this false one."

Red tried to stand, but only managed to fall, Robin ran to him and swiftly helped him back on to the bed "real love is what kept me from dying again." He smiled and laid down, his hand clasped in Robins. The boy wonder laid by red, closing his eyes. "What do you mean again?" Red X shook his head, never mind kid… can we just sleep? I'm tiered. "Not until I re-stitch your side." Batman said, walking over with a kit. He shooed everyone else out and pulled out a sterile needle "Robin, do you want to stay in the room?" Robin looked at Red and nodded "I don't trust myself not to leave without at least one of you near me." He whispered. Batman nodded and stitched up a silent Red X's side.

As soon as he was done, the boy looked at him "where am I, anyway?" Robin smiled "my room." Red smiled "then I'm right where I want to be." Batman shook his head "no sex until this heals up." Red folded his arms. You didn't need to see the boy's face to know he was pouting. "Good night boys." He walked out. The moment he closed the door he looked at the other titans "Ware is Robin's exercise room?"

After giving him directions, all the titans looked at each other "well, now we all know ware Robin gets it from" Bb stated, everyone else nodded.

Back in Robin's room

Robin lay by Red X, staring at him, curious and worried. He took Red's mask off, than his own "What did you mean, when you said 'love is what kept you from dying again'?" Red wrapped an arm around Robin, sighing, and closed his eyes "It's a long story, kid." The other teen smiled and kissed Red's cheek "we've got all night."" Red X closed his eyes before the pain could show through "I grew up thinking I was poor…" the red head started.

_Little Red X ran to his mother, nuzzling into her arm as the happy women picked him up. Even in the dingy house in 'poor town', the women seemed to shine. She was all Red X really needed, and his father smiled proudly from the other side of the room. "I'll be back after work, Leo, and then I promise to plan your birthday party. Little Red laughed and nodded "ok, I love you mommy!" the women kissed his forehead "I love you too."_

"But my mom never came back…" red whispered softly, looking at his hands in his lap. "She worked at a bank down town. Some creep needed cash fast, and decided to rob the place. My mom survived the bullet would the bastard put in her gut, but not the police. You see, there was a cop by the name of Caleb Gresh, he was corrupt, and mom had seen the guy's face. So, to save his partner, the one who shot my mom, from the chair, he waited until the room was clear enough slit her throat. Someone saw him, told the cops, Caleb went down and then got off scot free; just like that.

Robin put a hand over his "I'm so sorry." Red shook his head, laughing bitterly "it happened, nothing anyone could have done about it. I was only six, and my seventh birthday was spent staring at my mom's corpse as a man who knew nothing about her talked about her life; how good of a mother she was, how good a wife she was…. I hated that priest. Nothing he could have said could even come close to my mother's kindness… her warmth." He closed his eyes and shook his head "beyond the point… that isn't the whole story."

_Red's father glared at him, staring in disgust at the hot dog grease on his face. "Someone called me, saying that they saw you stealing, boy. It looks like they were right." He grabbed the front of little red's shirt and lifted him by it "your mother hated thieves. Do you have an excuse?!" Little red glared, suddenly not so scared. What was the worst that could happen, the man would beat him; so what. It was just another thing he was getting slowly used to. He kicked and struggled until his father dropped him "I wouldn't steal if I weren't hungry! I need food!" he man glared and narrowed his eyes "I left food." Red glared "no, you didn't. You left condiments and mold; I can't live off of mustard!" _

_His father turned and shook his head "then I guess you'll just have to move in with Cassy and me."_

"Then he took me to a woman's home. A women's house, he'd been seeing Cassandra since before my mom had died. She was filthy rich." He shook his head "my dad kept with his bull shit, beat me, fed me little, and hated me. Cassandra and him were married three years ago, after his son's sudden, announced death." He took a deep breath and looked at Robin "did you ever hear about Leo Roger Marin?"

Robin nodded slowly, already knowing the truth.

"Well," he shook his head "when he 'took ill' I was really just being starved and locked away in my room, when Leo 'died' I had really run away. He's been trying to make my death real ever since. My father, Roger Marin, owner of Roger's riches, has been trying to kill me since I was eight years old. And, to defend myself and taunt him, I steal only from his store, and use the goods to buy assistance, food, and housing… and just because I like shiny things and deserve them far more than he does." Red nodded at this, as if there were no other facts in the world.

Robin ran a hand down Red's face "I don't know what to say red. I'm so sorry." Red turned and kissed the palm of Robin's hand "don't be. I may be dead to the world, but I'm alive with you." He smiled up at him "besides kid, the past is behind me, and I've gotten used to the pain. No, that's a lie, I've overcome the pain." He wrapped an arm around the other boy's neck "and I have you to thank for it. The moment I knew of 'the boy wonder' I found myself able to smile, having someone to adore really makes it worthwhile."

Robin lent down and kissed Red deeply, tangling a hand in his hair as Red pulled his body closer to his own. Suddenly, he hissed in pain. "Sorry." He pulled away. Red shook his head, laughing "I'm fine, just a bit sore… sleep by me?" Robin laid by him, covering them both up "of course."

They slept in each other's arms, both smiling.


	26. Breaking free, Flying home

_**Breaking free, flying home**_

Slade's patience had thinned in the first few days, it had become as thin as the skin on a shark's teeth in one week, it had run out within two weeks, now, two weeks and three days later, he was fed up and pissed off.

He knew letting him go had been a bad idea. But he couldn't have stopped him, and he couldn't go after him now. He would wait a little while longer… it gave him a chance to get his tests done instead; time that his sweet Robin would have otherwise spent alone.

()*()*()*

Currently

()*()*()*()*

Ro bin was stretching, staring at the food that Red had set out. He'd taken to dropping by randomly; slipping past all the tower's defenses, raiding the fridge, and making everyone at the tower hate him every other day. God, Robin loved him. He smiled and sat at the table "did Batman leave yet?" Red chuckled and put a plate in front of him "good morning to you too, Robin. And no, the bat says something about not trusting you… you know, your condition and all."

Robin groaned "god, don't you just get tired of him too?" Red cleared his throat "actually, no. I agree with him." At Robin's incredulous look, the red head merely shrugged "You still aren't acting like yourself. You won't touch me, you don't put gel in your hair anymore; I like you kid… too much to be unsure of whether or not you're going to be safe or not while I'm not around. Just give it some time."

Robin sighed, and then smirked "I won't touch you, huh?" suddenly, he was behind Red, wrapping his arms around him, and then he turned him around and gave him a kiss that blew his mind. His breath was hot and wanting, his body lithe and his skin pale. His ruby lips teased at red's, the way his teeth grazed his lips and tongue just enough to make him shudder in pleasure… it was just too experienced too practice. He almost pulled away, but he didn't. Instead he kissed back, tangling a hand in his hair.

Batman clenched his fist in the shadows, a look of pain crossing his face, as he was swept away by his memories, the same memories he always felt when acknowledging his feelings to Robin.

_Richard screamed, bolting from his bed. Sobs wrecked his body. Bruce opened the door, and looked around for the invisible enemy. But one look at Robin told him that there was no saving the poor kid from his monsters._

_Richard slumped to the ground, not knowing he wasn't alone. He gripped the front of his shirt, as if in terrible pain, and cried. It had only been three days since he'd moved into Wayne manor, and every night he had the same dream. _

_His memories of his mom, his dad… his life, they haunted him._

_Bruce knew this feeling. He knew there was nothing he could say or do to help, so he shut the door silently and clenched his eyes tightly, hearing the boy's broken heart rip open with every retching sob that broke free; he would soon run out of tears. He walked away, it was best. No one could help the boy heal but himself, he'd learned that the hard way_

_It was Robin's first day of school, and he came back home right after the bell rang. He entered the mansion and ripped off his tie. Something was bothering him. Bruce lent against the wall "what's up?"_

_Robin shook his head "I hate it there. Everyone's so… and then they…." The boy looked away "they all say 'hi, you must be 'Dick Wayne', or 'oh, Bruce Wayne's boy! How charming'… they act like I'm one of them!" Bruce licked his lips and looked down. 'One of them' he meant the other boys, the rich boys. And he was not a fancy kid, he was a circus boy! He'd petted lions and swung from the highest heights; he was the boy wonder, and 'Rich' was only a part of his name to him. Bruce settled his hands on his shoulders "you _do _belong there, Dick, you are my adopted son, and no one would be able to look the other way if Bruce Wayne put his son in some public school."_

_Alfred intervened and offered Richard some milk and cookies._  
__-__

_Robin had woken up from a nightmare, and knocked on Bruce's door. But he wasn't there. Alfred had told him, when Bruce had come across the boy, fast asleep outside of his bedroom door, that Dick had waited all of the night. _

_Bruce decided he needed to get over his fears, so he took the still sleeping child to bed, and tucked him in. then he turned and left. E wished he could hold him, and tell him that everything was alright; that everything would be just fine in the morning. But it wouldn't be, his life would never be the same again._

_It was Richard's Sixteenth birthday, and he was making small talk with the boys in his class. He didn't like them, he didn't even know half of their name; Richard had no true friends. But Bruce had taught him to act like the entire world knew him, because some day, they would._

Bruce sighed; he'd messed up so much. He was never helping, when all he wanted to make it easier for the boy, he made it worse.

For the next month Robin slowly, but noticeably healed, only becoming depressed ever so often. Red was kissing Robin in the living room, gently cradling his face, smiling as the other teen blushed and latched to him.

Bruce watched from the corner with sad eyes, still wishing that he'd never broken the boy's heart…

Suddenly, the alarm's screamed; not the alarms for a city attack, one that meant an intruder was on the island. Batman immediately made his presence known as he shut the siren off "don't worry; he's not much of a threat. He's skinnier then an anorexic Riddler." There was a sudden banging on the door "ROBIN! ROBIN! SLADE'S IN TROUBLE!"

Robin bolted to the door "That's James!" both men tried to stop him at the mention of Slade. Robin was faster, and he wretched the door open "James, what's wrong?" The man in question had blood dripping from his head "It's Slade, we were undergoing the usual experiments… then his vitals started failing, he started having memory relapses… He's in a paranoid trance. We think you might be able to break through to him. Please, Robin, he needs you."

Robin looked back, everyone had come into the living room, everyone stared at him with pleading eyes "don't kid, you're doing so well."

Robin shook his head, closing his eyes, then looked at James "take me to him."


	27. All for the love of a bird

_**All for the love of a bird**_

Robin was helped off of a jet only two hours later "he's in this building" James explained, still walking with him "behind a thick wall of glass, he thinks he's in a war right now, world war two, to be exact. The medication we are trying to administer will break him of this, if only we can get close enough without being… killed." Robin nodded "I can try…"

When they got there, Slade was trying to break free of the thick glass, screaming in Russian.

Robin slowly walked in through the door behind him "…Slade?" The older man rounded on him, glaring "what do you want?" he stepped forward, glaring. Robin swallowed "It's me… Robin, your lover."

Slade charged at him, ready to attack. Robin just stood there "Slade, please." He was cut off by Slade's fist ramming into his gut, then another fist coming to meet his jaw. He flipped in the air, dodging every next move. Then landed behind Slade and stabbed the medication into Slade's back. Slade turned around; growling, then his eye softened "Robin?" he passed out.

Robin caught him, but he was a little heavy, so he slid to the floor, holding him close "oh, Slade… Will he be ok?" he asked as James walked in "we think so." He nodded "it was my fault, I'm sorry; I was tapping into his anger, what caused it, and how he could control it. Basically prodding his tainted cells, to see what makes him tick. Then he woke up and attacked me." Robin nodded and put a hand to James's bloody head "it looks painful." James laughed softly and put a hand over his "it doesn't hurt, really." Suddenly Slade woke, then glared and yanked Robin away from James, growling low in his throat.

Robin turned and wrapped his arms around Slade "are you alright now…?" Slade only nodded, still glaring at James "keep your hands off of Robin." The hero shook his head "I was only looking at the wound you gave him, Slade, calm down!" Slade sighed, letting his anger go "I'm sorry…. just protective." James nodded and went back to his computer "I did some research on your cells, the medication we gave you won't suffice… it will only band aid it for a short while." He went into his nerd-speak, completely losing Robin. Slade saw the blank look on his lover's face. Then laughed as soon as James was done talking "what he's saying is that I won't get better this round either. And their giving you tranquilizers in case of emergency; I suggest you keep one on you at all times.

Robin nodded "you got it." he softly kissed Slade's cheek, smiling as Slade's hand stroked up and down his arm "we should get back. Thank you James, we'll be leaving now."

James sighed "alright, rest for at least three days, no overdoing it for at least a week. Now, off with you." He smiled. Robin helped a rather weak and limping Slade into an aircraft before buckling himself in.

~*~*~*currently*~*~*~*

Red was sitting in the middle of the living room, his head in his hands

Raven looked at him and sighed, Bb looked around "so… what do we do now?"

Red pushed himself off of the couch "we do nothing. He won. Slade won, alright?" Everyone looked at him, and Raven's eyes drifted to the ground, she nodded slowly "Robin is gone now, and we still have work to do. Red X is right, we will have to go on without our friend, and remember who we are. We are still the teen titans."

Red walked out "and I'm still alone." He whispered as he close the door behind him, then walked to his grave and cried tears so pure and cold, not even the weeping stone Angel that morned from above him could compare.

And for all to know,

And for all to have heard,

Time is lost,

Lives are lost,

All for the love of one bird.

_**A/N **_

The end?


End file.
